Chalked by Mabz

TONIGHT IS THE NIGHT!

I coooould type up some super cheesy and totally overused inspirational quote about keeping your head up high or some shit here, but really I just want to post this STUNNING photo of myself from my branding session with @rubiconphotogs and really, I couldn’t be bothered with coming up with a better caption.

FA LA LA LA FESTIVE PARTY PACKS Not sure about you, but on a stress scale of 1-10 (10 being full on melt downs and car cries) holiday gift buying falls around the 8-9.5 range for me. Parking garages are my literal nightmare (dude, where’s my car?), over-crowded shopping malls give me the sweats and I always, without a doubt, forget to snag stocking stuffers. And those are my PRE-covid sentiments...the idea of waiting in lines and shopping for gifts now? ... Fa la la la fuck that noise. So when @amandajuliaevents reached out and asked if I would participate in a holiday themed party pack filled with locally-sourced goods, I said yes (!!!) and immediately crossed 3 names off my list (and as a result, bringing my stress level momentarily down to a 6 or 7.) Suuure, one of those names happens to be my own, but who can blame me? I have it all (including must-have social media moments) planned out. Picture this: It’s Christmas Eve, the boys are (finally) in bed and despite my many attempts at NOT waiting last minute, I only just finished buying and wrapping gifts. I’m tired, I’ve got wrapping paper cuts all over and I’m about to call it a night when I remember...the party pack. Giddy with excitement I’ll turn on the included festive playlist and perform my @lipsyncbattle-worthy rendition of Mariah Carey’s all I want for Christmas is you as I run the bath and light my @thevalleycandleco soy candle. While the bath is running, I’ll heat up some oat milk and boomerang the shit out of my @mugbombs hot chocolate bomb. Next comes the make-sure-your-naked-body-isn’t-reflecting-in-the-faucet (again) boomerang featuring a candy cane bath bomb by @shopfireandheart. Once the songs sung, the hot chocolate is drank, the candle is out and my body is soaked, I’ll get my pruney ass out of the tub, cozy up in my party-pack exclusive @bbxcollection Fa la la la la crew neck sweatshirt and, with a @cocktailcatering.co espresso martini in hand, admire my own hand-lettered ornament on the tree. Then, and only then, I’ll whisper I’m never doing fucking custom ornaments ever again. *for more info on the party pack, check the link in my bio* @ Ottawa, Ontario

Gimme allll the white cups!

This. Is. Incredible. Wowwwwwww