Circle Death Care

Secondary losses due to Covid19 What is a secondary loss? In the grief world we often speak about the secondary loss. The loss of the connections and identity ...that we had in relation to a person who died: loss of dreams, a future together, our role, etc. But when it comes to Covid19, there are other secondary losses that we are facing. It’s not just the loss of our routine regarding work and school. Some of the secondary losses you may be feeling due to Covid19: 1. Loss of Self the part of the self that was clearly defined in the pre-Covid19 world, such as employment. 2. Loss of Community if one is not able to see or be close to their desired community. 3. Loss of Safety and Security not knowing what to expect, what will happen next, or how anyone will deal with the situation, the vulnerability of feeling exposed to the unknown and the lack of safety it may hold. 4. Loss of the Familiar Way of Relating to Family and Friends the new way of relating, the distance that may be felt, and the potential misunderstandings that may arise because of new ways of relating. 5. Loss of the Future the fear of thinking ahead and of imagining next year or next month or next week without knowing what our new future will look like. 6. Loss of Direction the sense that nothing seems to matter as much anymore, that there is not the same purpose. 7. Loss of Choices the sense that one has less control over one’s life choices; that this new lifestyle was not a conscious choice. 8. Loss of physical contact not being able to hug, shake hands, or comfort someone close to you. 9. Loss of Trust trusting the world and what society will now look like, can we settle into this new normal? Or will it all change again? Feelings of loss are unique to everyone. Acknowledging them will help you move through them. Grief needs space to be heard and held. It is healing to honour our own grief, as is extending that honour to others.