First Edmonton Protestant Reformed Church
15911 107A Avenue T5P 0Z3 Edmonton, AB, Canada

If you know of someone caught in the sin of pornography; but they don’t want to get help or tell anyone. What do you do from there? Do you tell someone? Who would you go to? Is anyone trusted OK to go to (e.g. parent, elder, friend, Pastor)? a. The way of Matthew 18 is the proper way of approaching someone walking in sin. Go to them personally with Scripture. See my answer to a previous question. The goal is to seek their repentance, which includes their sorrow for their ...sin and turning from it, looking to God for forgiveness in the blood of the cross. One visit would likely not be enough to seek their repentance; nevertheless every circumstance will vary. b. If they continue in sin, Matthew 18 teaches us to take one or two more with you that every word may be established. This would likely be more than one visit and discussion. c. If the person refuses to hear you and the witnesses, tell it to the church so that the church may pursue discipline. Matthew 18:17 And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican.

Hello everyone. Rev. Marcus has answered a few more questions that were submitted to him from our November lecture. See Q and A below and in following posts. 1. Is it possible to simply admire someone’s beauty in a right way (when not married)? I’m specifically thinking of someone who is dress immodestly (or not dressed) and someone says, I’m just admiring their beauty. Is that possible to do that rightly? a. The question rightly implies that the only proper occasion in w...hich to admire the beauty of someone of the opposite sex is in the confines of marriage. Solomon rightly admired the beauty of his spouse: Song of Solomon 7:3 Thy two breasts are like two young roes that are twins. b. Many fool themselves into thinking that they are simply admiring beauty, when in fact they are looking at a woman to lust after her. At no time is it ever defensible to look at someone who is dressed immodestly (or undressed) in order to admire their beauty. Exodus 20:17 Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife. Matthew 5:28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

Another question that arose from the lecture is answered below. 1. How do we approach someone we know (husband, wife, friend, child, etc) who struggles with the sin of pornography? (in the case of a person struggling on their own, and we have knowledge of their sin) a. If we love a person we know to be struggling with sin, we certainly ought to approach them. Galatians 6:1 Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spir...it of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. b. But, it’s especially important that we approach others the spirit of meekness. If we have struggled with the same sin ourselves, it’s helpful to acknowledge that to them and not have a judgmental and self-righteous attitude. At the very least, we ought to acknowledge that we are all fellow sinners in need of Jesus Christ. c. A wife discovering her husband’s enslavement to pornography might become extremely angry. But, that anger must not be allowed to turn into bitterness and sin and isolating herself from her husband. Such a response might lead the husband to isolate himself. Ephesians 4:26 Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: d. The goal in approaching someone walking in sin is not to give them a piece of our self-righteous minds; the goal is to bring them to repentance. To that end, we must first go to them with an evident love for their souls, showing them from Scripture that they are walking in sin. Nathan the prophet convinced David of his sin with Bathsheba by use of a powerful parable. e. We must show them that there is hope in Jesus Christ. There is forgiveness with God in the blood of the cross. And there is grace to help us in the battle. 1 Corinthians 10:13 There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it. f. Lastly, we must be willing to walk next to the brother or sister to help them out of the ditch they have made for themselves. Accountability is an important factor in helping someone who has a besetting sin. James 5:16 Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

Pornography Lecture Question: What barriers would a young person face entering marriage having viewed porn in the past? a. Pornography teaches us to be consume...rs that treat sex as a commodity to be obtained on demand for one’s own pleasure. In contrast, the biblical view of sex is a matter of serving, honoring, and cherishing the other. Pornography teaches that sex is about pleasure-on-demand getting. Scripture teaches that love is about giving (cf Gal 5:13). Pornography thus becomes the propaganda of the devil steering one towards lust and away from the biblical idea of love. b. One who is enslaved by pornography before marriage will must not expect to be delivered from that enslavement simply by getting married. Pornography is driven by selfish lust. Marriage doesn’t change the heart of one enslaved by that lust. Even if the sin is repented of, one who has abused pornography before marriage will more easily fall back into that abuse in marriage. This will be especially tempting when disappointments and difficulties arise in the marriage. c. Even if pornography is repented of, the horrible images burned into one’s mind will persist for years to come. As those images persist, it will be difficult not to compare one’s spouse to those images. See more

Here is the full version of our recent lecture regarding Pornography. The live stream was cut in two by circumstances beyond our control. Glad to see so many tuning in during the lecture. https://youtu.be/uGzKNRQKmAg We will begin answering questions in the next day or two. -Reverend Marcus