Elsbeth Dodman

Dear David I love finding nice quiet corners; pockets in places where no one can find me or reach me. I used to be able to fit in-between the wall and the large sideboard that holds all mom’s good plates in the dining room. But at 29 that’s not possible anymore. Once I climbed myself into the cupboards at a Home Depot - those half-made kitchen setups they have on display. I wondered if it would feel as good to hide in the quiet as I imagined it might, as I remembered it did...Continue reading

Dear David There’s this weird feeling you get when you’re at an Autism rally or conference in some classroom or discussion somewhere - and you’re one of the only Autistic people present. Maybe you side-eye the other person on the spectrum, maybe you wave, maybe you lean over and ask them if they’re finding it as awkward as you. And it is awkward, David, being the subject of discussion but not at all represented. Like someone who has never lived in Holland is trying to descr...Continue reading

Dear David We talk about it, you know. A cure. It gets tossed around on message boards and in small internet posts; would you take it for just a day? Would you take it for a year? What about forever. I’m more than a little scared of what a cure would mean for us for me. ...Continue reading

Dear David There have been more police officers downtown on my way to and from work. I noticed a few more on the streets and in the busy market today when Kim and I took our lunch break. Big, tall, broad men in hats and dark blue uniforms with a red stripe down the pant leg. I stare at the black gun at their hips: I’ve never seen a real gun up close, David, just on TV or in movies and they seem like a foreign object a dangerous one. It’s like keeping your eyes on a cobra so ...Continue reading

Dear David How do you forgive someone? My sister found one of the boys from my old public school deep in the maze I guess she just ran into him as people do. Honestly I don’t know what happened to most of the perfect little sunshines I went to school with, I don’t think about them much except when I dream of disabled little girls with chains around their necks. ...Continue reading