Glow Doula

Absolutely love this

Just a reminder

'I'm not allowed', 'they won't let me', 'I have to..' . BULLSHIT! .... These are phrases I hear from almost everyone I've worked with. 'I'm NOT ALLOWED a home birth because I have a high BMI'. 'They WONT LET ME use the pool because I need an induction'. 'I've got gestational diabetes, so I HAVE to have an induction' . The only LEGAL aspect of having a baby (in the UK) is registering their birth after they are born. The rest is up to you. Have you had a scan yet? A blood test? All optional! Your care providers are there to give you evidence based information, so that YOU can make a decision about what feels best for you and your baby and to then support you in those choices. Of course, they can make recommendations and give advice &the majority of the time you may find yourself agreeing with them. However, these recommendations are not laws & to an extent are influenced by hospital policy, local service provisions & individual care providers interpretation of research. A different HCP, a different hospital, a different country- you may well be told something completely different! . So, how do you make sure the decisions you are making are right for you? 1) Ask questions- ask for the benefits and risks of accepting AND declining a suggested course of action. 2) Ask what your alternatives are. 3) Ask for 'risk' to be presented in absolute figures (watch my IGTV on risks for an explaination) 4) Keep asking 'how does this apply to me?' 5) Gather your own information. No, not on mumsnet! Ask to read the research, evidence based books such as those from AIMS and Sara Wickham are excellent resources. 6) Ask for a 2nd opinion. You may wish to book in with a consultant midwife, independent MW or alternative OBGYN to get a different perspective . Is there anything you've been told you're 'not allowed'? . And just incase you didn't believe me, here is an amazing photo of a super mummy (with a raised BMI) having her water birth at home! @milkandhannah

I'm now 29 and have 3 kids with my wife Franziska who carried and birthed them all like a pro. Here's what I would tell my childless 24 year old self about how ...to be a supportive partner during the "becoming parents" phase: . 1. Wifey carried baby IN her belly for 9 months. So you carry baby ON your belly for 9 months every chance you get. Not only does it help her recover but it bonds you to your kid more than imaginable. . 2. Wifey is breastfeeding and--while beautiful and fulfilling for her--it's exhausting. So you change EVERY diaper you can. From diaper #1 onward. You will get over the grossness fast. And you will prevent imbalances and resentment in the relationship; in fact, when all your wife's friends are complaining about how absent and unsupportive their husbands are, your wife will be bragging about you. . 3. Make her the decaf coffee every morning. Even if she leaves it cold and forgets to drink it most mornings because she falls back asleep while you're working or (later) taking the kids to school. She was up all night feeding the baby so help start her day in a way that helps her reset. . 4. Tell her she is beautiful and help her see that in the moments when she is feeling most self critical and hopeless about her body. Remind her of times when she achieved goals in the past. Remind her she is a superhero. She literally just moved all her organs around and gained 20 kilograms to give you a child that will be a gift to you for the rest of your life. Help her see past her body image issues and stay focused on a positive goal, one day at a time. . 5. Take the heat. Hormones are crazy, both pre and post birth. She won't seem like herself every day and sometimes she will say things she wouldn't say if she didn't feel like she was hungover, caffeinated, and on steroids every day. Remember your job is to be her rock through all of this, so toughen up and keep perspective when her tongue is sharper than you know her best self intends. Normal will return soon and you want her to be grateful that you kept it together when she wasn't, not resentful and disappointed that you hijacked her emotions by making her problems yours. By Ted Gonder See more

Whether you lost your baby at 6 weeks. Whether you lost your baby at 12 weeks. Whether you lost your baby at 16 weeks. Whether you lost your baby at 20+ weeks.... Your pregnancy loss matters. Your grief matters. Your tears matter. You matter. #pregnancyandinfantlossawarenessmonth