James Barber Counselling Services

Couples during a crisis... Helping move from "I've never felt so alone" to "We're in this together" can make all the difference right now. Check out this article I wrote recently as the resident Couples Counsellor for ONE Health Services, in Etobicoke.

Come join me and Dr. Melanie DeCunha as we talk couples facing hard times together. How can we turn toward each other for support when our instinct is to turn away and self-protect? Find us at www.instagram.com/onehealthservices

At times of high stress, we tend to want to run toward our comfort zones, hoping for solid ground. As an introvert by nature, something I have to be mindful of is not confusing social withdrawal with self-care. Good self-care should absolutely include rest, but social withdrawal is often more a response to fear and anxiety. For me right now, it’s more important than ever that I be intentional with keeping up my relationships and staying connected. I have to, in a way, get ov...er myself. As hard as it may be, physical distancing presents us with an opportunity to replace some old mindsets with ones that serve us better. That help us stay grounded, connected and will help us build resilience.

This crisis is hitting us all a little differently. We feel scared and anxious. We’re fighting the worry and trying our best to keep calm and carry on. But whether that’s mostly for our sake or for the kids in our life who notice everything, we're finding ourselves saying, "I'm okay," even when we're not. We need solid ground.... We feel restless. Going stir-crazy on a whole new level. We’re just not wired for being trapped inside for an extended period. Cut off from friends, family members and co-workers. We need connection. We’re finding community in surprising ways. Work colleagues are laughing and crying together during Zoom team meetings. Neighbours are meeting online to help out the most vulnerable people in their community. We need to remember this when the crisis lifts. Whatever you’re experiencing right now, be patient and kind to yourself. This isn’t the time to be perfect; it’s the time to be gracious. If you’d like to speak with a Registered Psychotherapist about how you are doing, safe and confidential Online Therapy sessions are available. Book online: https://oab.owlpractice.ca/jamesbarber

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