Janis Aylward Psychotherapy and Consulting
Unit #490 1184 Roland St., Thunder Bay, ON P7B 5M4 P7A 4K9 Thunder Bay, ON, Canada

We use this technique in our yoga practice, but it’s actually been used for centuries by many cultures and is known as Shaking Medicine. Learn more about alternative medicine: http://ow.ly/h1V930i4LCC

With the arrival of #BellLetsTalk, we thought it'd be the perfect time to remind everyone that the #opioidcrisis is still here. Right now, there are extremely d...angerous drugs in our community, and we want to make sure everyone can help spot the signs of an overdose potentially saving a life. No one chooses a life with addiction, there's always an underlying reason, we can not shy away from helping someone because of their situation. The Thunder Bay District Health Unit has a great resource on their website on how you can help prevent an overdose and help to save a life. Click here for that information: https://www.tbdhu.com//opioids/preventing-opioid-overdose-

Maybe you know or suspect you have a covert narcissist in your life now and perhaps you are BEYOND TERRIFIED of experiencing another one AGAIN. Covert narcissis...ts are amongst the slipperiest and most dangerous because they are the hardest of all to detect! YetTRULY, it is NOT true that you are defenceless against them. It is my greatest wish that this Thriver TV Episode will take away the fear of covert narcissists forever, and even excite you about your possibilities going forward How To Flush Out A Covert Narcissist Before It's Too Late - https://bit.ly/3ddRHv4 Have you had enough of the pain yet of trying to work them out, the narcissists instead of sorting yourself out to change your life? If so, it is time for Thriver inner development, and I promise you it is incredibly liberating and fun and such a relief to do it. Your True Self and Life will start to glow and grow in time frames and ways that will stun you. So, to get started click the link below and join the thousands of Thrivers in this Community. FREE 16 Day Recovery Course -Maybe you know or suspect you have a covert narcissist in your life now and perhaps you are BEYOND TERRIFIED of experiencing another one AGAIN. Covert narcissists are amongst the slipperiest and most dangerous because they are the hardest of all to detect! YetTRULY, it is NOT true that you are defenceless against them. It is my greatest wish that this Thriver TV Episode will take away the fear of covert narcissists forever, and even excite you about your possibilities going forward How To Flush Out A Covert Narcissist Before It's Too Late - https://bit.ly/3ddRHv4 Have you had enough of the pain yet of trying to work them out, the narcissists instead of sorting yourself out to change your life? If so, it is time for Thriver inner development, and I promise you it is incredibly liberating and fun and such a relief to do it. Your True Self and Life will start to glow and grow in time frames and ways that will stun you. So, to get started click the link below and join the thousands of Thrivers in this Community. FREE 16 Day Recovery Course - https://bit.ly/2BauAmW Much love xo

Watch this video to find out what you need to do so you don't fall for a narcissist ever again. Use The Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program to help you - https://bit.ly/3nKiO6G Much love xo

Do you do any of these 4 signs around a narcissist you know? If so, you may be experiencing trauma bonding with them. 1. You make excuses and justifications for... abusive behaviour. 2. As the abuse intensifies you try to 'fix' things. 3. If this person does something 'nice' you experience hope and relief. 4. When away from this person you feel like you are going to die. Trauma bonding feels like love, it feels like you will die without someone and that you won’t get over the fact that you can’t have a happy and healthy relationship with this person. I promise none of this is true. I don’t think anyone could possibly have prepared themselves for the intense, inexplicable and deadly bonding experience that happens with a narcissist. Trauma bonding is being connected to someone through your internal wounds. When we have unhealed unconscious inner parts, they play out by us becoming attached to the exact people who play out these parts with us. I went through trauma bonding too, so please don't feel alone with this. Today, after healing these parts with NARP (the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program - https://bit.ly/2XvpMAS) I experience healthy happy relationships that are kind, supportive and healthy, and I have absolutely no trouble walking away from anyone who represents abuse because I feel whole, safe and powerful within. I want the same for you too and know what a huge difference in your life and relationships it will create once you get there. For deeper delve into the 4 Ways To Know If You Are Being Trauma Bonded - https://bit.ly/33tVPFe. Much love xo

Codependency is a state of being that we have all been conditioned to live by. Unfortunately, from birth, we are taught that happiness comes from something out...side of ourselves, and to find it, we must first obtain something external to ourselves. It could be a love partner, group of friends or possessions such as a new house or car. We use these things to define our sense of self-worth. The problem is that conditioning of codependency over many years has become a part of you, and it can be difficult to break when you first choose to make the shift to independence, or as I like to call it True Self. The only way you can make this shift is if you really commit to yourself, and don’t give up when you don’t get immediate results. I have put together a quick questionnaire that I would love you to partake in, concerning the topic Doing Healing Work On Myself. This survey will grant you a better understanding of how you may move through to Who You Really Want to Be, and where you are at concerning your partnership with yourself. Print these questions off, or write them down and answer them. If you would like to and feel brave enough too (grin) please share your answers on this post, and you may even want to share an explanation of how you personally feel about this topic! Do you Commit to Working on Yourself? 1) I am totally committed to working on myself and apply personal development in my life: a) Regularly as a lifestyle every day b) Once a week or more c) Only occasionally d) Very rarely e) Never 2) The times when I commit to working on myself are: a) As a lifestyle, I love to grow and become more conscious and empowered b) When I feel myself slipping and know I need to work on myself c) Occasionally for no particular reason d) When other people suggest I attend a self-development event e) Never 3) I feel totally comfortable spending time with myself reading, journaling and doing healing visualisations a) Yes, I love time alone committed to being with me b) Sometimes I like to take time out to heal myself c) Occasionally I will do it, but I usually have to force myself to do so d) I am much more comfortable with someone else granting me information or healing me, than working on myself e) I don’t grant myself inner attention 4) The reasons why I do or don’t commit to spending time healing myself are: a) I love gaining awareness, answers and understanding, supporting and giving to myself on a deep level thus empowering my life b) I am terrified about having to face what could be wrong with me c) I don’t like my own company d) I’m too busy looking after everyone else to look after me e) I don’t have time for my own dedication because of my work/life commitments f) I believe I am beyond hope, and it won’t work g) I want someone else to give me love and support, and then I might believe I deserve to grant myself support and attention h) I have no idea how to I’m not going to provide you with any set results regarding your answers. In fact, this questionnaire is designed to prompt you to seek your answers for yourself because that is what self-actualisation is all about! If you are ready to commit to healing your codependency, the Empowered Self Course has three Modules dedicated to helping you achieve this and much more. Take a look here - The Empowered Self Course - https://bit.ly/3kmU02k. Much love xo

Blah blah blah ... how many of these have you heard? I'm sure you know many more! Delve deeper into the meaning behind the words in this blog - Narcissists... Are Predictable! 10 Things All Narcissists Say - https://bit.ly/3ngrujM. Much love xo

It’s chilly outside but warm in here, the fireplace is on and the tea is ready! https://creativecounsellingthunderbay.janeapp.com/

People think the narcissistic parent is lovely and has a beautiful nature; that they love and adore their family. Little do they know the truth of what goes on ...behind closed doors when ‘others’ are not around. Image, pretences and having others envy and think that the narcissist has the ‘perfect’ life, is all part of a False Self constructing a False Life. If you experienced this as a child, you may be hard on yourself regarding how you appear to others and believe that people will only accept you if you are ‘perfect’. You will have gone through the devastation of being treated like an object, so as to present a perfect image, rather than as a blood, flesh and soul human being with feelings. You may get into relationships with people who objectify you, and you may even do this to yourself (rather than connect to your own true feelings and needs). If this sounds all too familiar to you, please take a look at this blog to discover there is a healing solution for you waiting for you. Narcissistic Parents - Can The Damage Be Repaired? - https://bit.ly/2UadwUg Much love xo

Anti-sexist educator and activist Jackson Katz wants people to look at: that whole range of issues that are referred to in shorthand as gender violence issues... in a new way: they’ve been seen as women’s issues that some good men help out with, but I have a problem with that frame and I don’t accept it. Instead, he says in his excellent TED talk -- which is especially timely during October's Domestic Violence Awareness Month -- I’m going to argue that these are men’s issues first and foremost. He argues that calling gender violence a women’s issue is part of the problem. Katz uses an analysis by feminist linguist Julia Penelope to show how changing the description changes the tone of the discussion: Start with ‘John beat Mary’.... the second sentence says the same thing in a passive voice, ‘Mary was beaten by John,’ and now a whole lot has happened in one sentence... We’ve shifted our focus in one sentence from John to Mary. And when the focus shifts further, you get ‘Mary was beaten’, and now it’s all about Mary; we’re not even thinking about John... and the final sentence in the sequence, flowing from the others, is ‘Mary is a battered woman’... [and] John has long ago left the conversation. Katz, who is the creator of Mentors in Violence Prevention, a leadership program focused on preventing all forms of men’s violence against women, says, those of us who work in the domestic and sexual violence field know that victim blaming is pervasive in this realm... but in terms of preventing violence, we have to ask a different set of questions... like why does John beat Mary, why is domestic violence still a big problem in the United States and all over the world. Once we’re thinking in this way, then we can ask about... how can we do something differently, how can we change the practices, how can we change the socialization of boys and the definitions of manhood that lead to these current outcomes. Katz asserts that there are powerful roles that men can play in this work" and he calls on his fellow men to put aside the notion of a gender war and stand side-by-side with women: We live in the world together... [we need] to get people to speak up and to create a peer culture where the abusive behavior will be unacceptable not because it’s illegal, but because it’s wrong and unacceptable in the peer culture. He says, there’s been an awful lot of silence in male culture about this ongoing tragedy... we need to break that silence, and we need more men to do that. And so Katz concludes, I hope that, going forward, men and women working together can begin the change and the transformation that will happen so that future generations won’t have the level of tragedy that we deal with on a daily basis... I know we can do it. We can do better. You can watch his excellent TED talk "Violence against women it's a men's issue," at http://bit.ly/Xq6fzu To read more from Jackson Katz, check out his book "The Macho Paradox: Why Some Men Hurt Women and and How All Men Can Help" at http://amzn.to/1pVzDem At A Mighty Girl, we believe that introducing boys to female role models is an important part of the process of fostering respect for girls and women. To find nearly 500 true stories of trailblazing women to share with your children, visit our "Role Model" biography collection at http://www.amightygirl.com/books/history-biography/biography For stories of girls and women experiencing and overcoming abuse and violence in their lives -- which offer a helpful way to talk to young people about the widespread problem of violence against women -- visit our Abuse & Violence" book section at http://www.amightygirl.com/boo/social-issues/abuse-violence For Mighty Girl books for teen readers (13+) that address issues of abuse and violence and offer a helpful way to spark conversations around this important topic, we recommend "Speak" (http://www.amightygirl.com/speak), "I Hadn't Meant to Tell You This" (http://www.amightygirl.com/i-hadn-t-meant-to-tell-you-this), and "If You Find Me" (http://www.amightygirl.com/if-you-find-me). To help your Mighty Girl learn how to build supportive, mutually respectful relationships, there is an excellent guide that provides foundational advice on approaching relationships in a healthy manner, "A Smart Girl's Guide to Boys," for girls 9 to 13 http://www.amightygirl.com/a-smart-girl-s-guide-to-boys For LQBTQ youth seeking relationship guidance, we recommend "Queer" for ages 13 and up at http://www.amightygirl.com/queer And, to teach older teens and adults about the warning signs of an abusive relationship and how to get help, a useful resource is Stop Signs: Recognizing, Avoiding, and Escaping Abusive Relationships at http://www.amightygirl.com/stop-signs

TRAUMA BONDING is one of the most horrific aspects of narcissistic abuse. How on earth can we CLING to someone who hurts us so much? Why do we know LOGICALLY th...at this person is destroying us, yet we can't STOP obsessing about them? I remember having the realisation that when people would hurt me, I would want to go TO them (to try to fix them), rather than pull away and help myself. You may relate, feeling terrified and shocked that you do this too. I knew it wasn't because I was a masochist. I KNEW it had to be something DEEPER. And when I discovered the reasons, BINGO! It made so much sense, just as it does for ALL of us. People ask all the time: WHY can't I get over this? WHY do I keep going back? WHY can't I get it through my head to leave this person? The reason is ALWAYS because of trauma bonding ... In this video I talk about the 5 Main Types that hook us, hurt us and KEEP us hurting and hooked. Until we unravel this at a deeper cellular reason, we can be stuck and even TRAPPED ... White-knuckling it if we do get away (akin to feeling like a heroine addict), and possibly finding ourselves breaking No Contact WAY too easily. If this is YOU then trauma bonding is responsible, and in this video you are likely to relate to some, if not all these 5 types of trauma-bonding. How to recognise the 5 types of trauma bonding - https://bit.ly/2CQmQpI To access my Quantum Healing solution, that finds and releases the trauma bonds from your being and psyche, so that the narcissist no longer has power over you: https://bit.ly/2yEsKFX Much Love xo

Coming up tomorrow in the Sisters of Grief group. Call 632-7899 to register.

Narcissists are very good at keeping allies close to them, and they won't hesitate to use them in a smear campaign. There will be incredible lies spread to all ...and sundry about the "terrible" person you are, and all the apparent bad things that you have done and are doing. Not only will this information be fabricated, stretched or incomplete; it is likely to be a projection of what the narcissist did and is doing themselves. And my heart goes out to you if you are currently the target of a smear campaign. I know this can sucker punch so hard that you wonder how you will ever recover from it. Yet, I really want to emphasise that this behaviour is entirely normal for a narcissist. Expect it, and then it won't be as much of a shock. Let go of being mortified by these outrageous behaviours and actions, so that you don't hook in trying to receive justice. If you react, it is going to make matters so much worse for you. It's vital that you detach, keep releasing all of these intense feelings of trauma and injustice and keep as healthy and whole on the inside as you can. Use the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program to help you do this - https://bit.ly/2E5nlyq. This is the most potent formula regarding being able to navigate what is necessary. The less affected you are, and the less you feed what is happening, the stronger the position you're in to get through this. Much love xo

Be great if every school posted this and talked about it with kids!! Please share with your families.

This is brilliant though I dislike labels this is good description!

Trauma has many faces...

BREAKING: NBC NEWS SPECIAL REPORT: JOE BIDEN WILL BE PRESIDENT-ELECT, NBC NEWS PROJECTS. https://www.nbcnews.com//biden-defeats-trump-win-white-hou

Understanding #intersectionality #privilege #ymhc All comments will now be hidden or deleted: it seems that many people do not understand intersectionality and ...social justice/human rights issues, the language used in the graphic image, or the ability to recognize their own privilege. It is taking too much time to read and hide your aggressive and disrespectful comments. See more

When someone tells you they were just joking, but the joke was at your expense, that's gaslighting. That's psychological abuse, not humor.

The rise of misogyny is frightful. I am happy to quieten my voice making room for yours. I am also happy to raise my voice to speak out and condemn such vile be...liefs. Silence is the friend of those who would abuse and seek to dominate and control. Silence is not a solution. Voting is but one way of having a voice. Speaking out about misogyny is another. As a man, letting other men know my views is yet another. https://www.thestar.com//watch-how-kamala-harris-is-treate

This Author’s first book was amazing and this builds on the Tribal Their To Create Real Healing using this Paradigm that looks at Trauma from a Moral Injury perspective!!

image: https://www.teacherspayteachers.com//Adolescent-Counseling

When dealing with a narcissist normal ‘human’ rules don’t apply! You can’t talk sense, be heard or reach a resolution. In fact, the narcissist DOESN’T want ANY ...resolution. So how do you deal with these individuals? How CAN you get peace, sanity, release, relief and your life back? Soooo many of you have asked me ‘How do I DEAL with this person? Well today’s information is going to HELP you beyond measure because I’m giving you the absolute sure-fire 8 ways that you can DEAL with a narcissist powerfully and effectively. 8 Things You Need To Know When Dealing With A Narcissist - https://bit.ly/2XbuzIc If you've had enough of wrestling with toxic people the 10 Steps in the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program will transform your life - https://bit.ly/2wjjk5E Much love xo