Jim Toth

It is now official - today I begin my 82nd trip around the sun. Seems odd to b e writing this as I really do not deserve this trip. As I look back I realize how much failure there has b een in my life. Even now as i am in my third year protesting against a chirch that ruined my l.ife, I feel failure. Not one person, not one, has come out to talk about resolution. So much for chirches.And no that is not a mispelling. This chirch no longer has "you" in it, it is so full of 'I"... I am right, I will not apologize, I did nothing wrong I, I, I. So let's get the "U" out if it no longer applies. 82 - is that a big number? Is it supposed to have any significanc?. I guess if it is shoe size it might, or if is my waist size it might, but really in the scheme of things, does it really mean anything. 82 cracks at achieving something and only succeeding at not peeing on the floor although as I uinderstand that may be coming next. With the school board I only achieved the position of being an educational proctologist - in church I failed to become ordained my aart -- so so, So what happens in this 82 trip around old "Sol"? Right now I am facing surgery for cataracts, my left tibia does not have blood flow to the bottom end so I am facing knee replacement, and a liklihood of back surgery to correct the severe pain I suffer. All this travelling and the price of gas is going up. Sure costs a lot if you want to travel anywhere today. Oh yes our front lawn is the worst since we havew lived here and that will require much renewing, not to mention that our main floor bathroom is no longer functional and has to be redone. Soon this day, I will crawl to the back of the bus, get some nice listening music from Sirius and just go alon g for the ride. Cheers, Jim See more

The last year, since I turned 80 has been a very painful year for me, physically, spiritually,aretfully and just in life. My back has gone through cat scans and MRI's to review I have spondilitis at L3,4 and 5 and C1. Yhe pain is excruciating and prevents me from doing almost everything - even reading is hard because of the pain. Both my knees are petty well shot and add to my inability to stand and walk. My visit to the emergency with severe back pains led me to a wonderful ...neurosurgeon who wants me to go through a series of cortizone shots to see if that allays the pain. Today I had my second shot and still experience a band of pain around my back. I also received my first shot in the left knee and when I stood up and walked, I was amazed - the pain had all gone. For the first time in almost one year I had no pain in my left knee and I could walk up the stairs on two feet instead of crawling up on fours. I am exhilarated at this freedom..I go for my third shot of cortizone in 4 weeks and if that doesn't do the job, then I have a five hour surgery ahead of me - both from the front and the back. I have not been away for a holiday from the house for almost one year and that ways very heavy on me.I am hoping to go to Calgary the first week of September to do some painting with a friend I have painted with before. I live in hope.I do not know what the summer will bring. Cheryl flies away two more times, once in July and once in August. I will stay at home to care for the house, the garden and Baxter.. Being almost 81 has not been a joyous time for me. I am now in my third year of protesting in front of the chirch that lied about me and ruined my life. Not one person has come out to see if a solution can be found. So much for Christianity. well, that's an update to now. If I make it to my 81st birthday in a month, I may write and share my" jubilation" in July 2018. Cheers, Jim. See more

I am unable to paint as much as I would like due to the great pain under which I live. The neuro surgeon said try cortizone first and if that does not work then major surgery. Right now I am in week two of waiting for the first shot. My time and days are not productive as I am on 1800mg of gabapentin to help alleviate the great pain. Getting old sucks.