Marli Rusen
1321 Blanshard St #301 V8W 0B6 Victoria, BC, Canada

In our new website, we have created the MIRROR Method shop to make it easier to access all of Marli's training, resources, and services. You can now purchase online for immediate access to resources like our self-paced video course and the MIRROR Method Book and Workbook. The shop also allows organizations to see what services Marli provides in order to determine what best suits their needs. To access the shop, or connect with us to have your questions answered, simply press the book now button in our menu bar. Or even easier? Click this link now. https://bit.ly/33WHseZ #HRCommunity #LeadershipDevelopment #RespectfulWorkplace

"Because I said so" is not helpful. Offering a clear rationale for why you need something done in a particular way or at a specific time does wonders in getting it to happen. #LeadingRespectfully #Leadership #HR

Cautious communication builds trust. If you’re wondering if you should say it, perhaps you shouldn’t. And if you do, then be cautious about how. #ReflectionsOnRespect #Healthy #Workplace

Exciting news! New year, new website! We have revamped our website to make it far easier to navigate so that you can easily check out access to our training, resources and services. With a quick click of your mouse, you can get immediate help in creating a healthy, productive, and respectful work environment and can access the many tools that Marli and her MIRROR Method deliver. Visit us today at themirrormethod.ca. We can’t wait to hear what you think! #HR #HRCommunity #LeadershipDevelopment

The one management mistake noted in this article is unclear expectations. It states that globally, only one in every two employees report knowing what is expected of them. It is critical for leaders (including leaders of leaders!) to communicate clear, specific and consistent expectations for those on their team. They should neither be too vague (be engaged; be present; be productive), or overly detailed (resulting in micromanagement). Start by defining the mandate/de...liverable for your team (on any given week or month); and then define expectations (tasks and timelines) that attach to individuals based on the broad mandate. As important as it is to define expectations, leaders also should help staff prioritize (triage) competing expectations. Not everything should be labeled as urgent and due tomorrow. Which of the urgent tasks are more urgent than others? Let them know this beforehand. If leaders take the time to set clear and understandable expectations at the outset and then remain available to help re-prioritize as new issues arise employees will feel more confident in what they are doing and why, resulting in far less internalized stress and outwardly focused angst, leading to a more stable and productive workplace for everyone. #HRCommunity #LeadershipDevelopment http://ow.ly/F3Ap50HrsYi

Don't get sucked into the "drama" of the first story you hear, even when it's your own. Remember that there are other perspectives and information you may not know about. Get curious before becoming critical. #LeadingRespectfully #HRCommunity

The Bad News? The past year has been incredibly stressful for many, and this stress has contributed to disrespectful communication and fractured work relationships. The Good News? It’s a New Year! This is an excellent time to re-set with your team and genuinely commit to a respectful work environment. Marli’s one-hour, self-paced online course on Building Respect and Resolving Conflict is an efficient and cost-effective starter kit for your organization. Order today (reduced cost per licence when bulk purchases are made). https://bit.ly/34j1fFr #HRCommunity #RespectfulTraining #2022

Unresolved conflicts at work are often brought home, affecting those we love the most. In committing to their resolution, you take care of yourself and those who care about you. #ReflectionsOnRespect #Healthy #Workplace

2022 is upon us. It’s time to ask how we can properly support our teams in having a respectful and productive year! Marli is here to help. Marli has many services and training to support you in building a respectful workplace, including on-line training for all staff, practical conflict resolution services and effective team building workshops. Contact us to learn how we can make 2022 healthy and successful for you and your teams. https://bit.ly/3FE8ndb #RespctfFulWorkplace #HappyNewYear #2022

Leadership is not about having all the answers. It’s often about asking the right questions, learning from and listening to others. #LeadingRespectfully #LeadershipDevelopment #HR

While others are responsible for their offensive comments or behaviour, you are responsible for how you react. #ReflectionsOnRespect #HealthWorkplace #HR

Each one of us, on occasion, has overreacted to something someone has said or done. The reason for our overreaction might have been unrelated to the other person’s actions. For example, we may have been under time pressures, hungry or exhausted. Or, something they said or the way in which they said it may have triggered a fear/anger response in us based on past negative interactions that had nothing to do with them. And sometimes it is absolutely because of what they sa...id or did but our disrespectful reaction was nevertheless unjustifiable. Regardless of which it might be, it is our responsibility to better understand and manage our overreactions to others, especially when they work to undermine a respectful working relationship or team culture. We can’t blame our disrespectful reactivity on our personality, our parents or our workloads. While all may have played a role, it is up to us to manage our communication, behaviour, reaction and response. This article offers two key ways to begin: first, reflect on those times in which you have overreacted and look for recurring themes. Once you have done so, have a practical plan ready when similar triggers and circumstances arise. This two-part process reflect on the past and then plan for the future gives you a tangible framework in which to manage the most unmanageable parts of yourself. https://www.inc.com//3-keys-to-managing-your-emotional-tri? #HRCommunity #Leadership #HR See more

Respectful leaders clearly define, uphold and model acceptable workplace communication and conduct. #LeadingRespectfully #HRCommunity

I had so much fun being a guest on this podcast with Lori Rilkoff and Lisa Fuller! Respect is an important, timely and serious topic but that didn’t stop us from sharing some laughs and enjoying each other’s company during this conversation. Thanks for inviting me! To listen to the podcast click the link loriandlisahr.podbean.com and enjoy! Talking HR with Lori and Lisa #loriandlisahr #hrpodcast #humanresources #HR #HRcommunity #dynamicworkplaces #TheMIRRORMethod #ReflectionsOnRespect

Happy Mothers Day!

This heartfelt article should remind employers everywhere that their employees are humans first, and their position, second. This remains true from their first day on the job to their last. The fact that someone may receive a severance package, pension or disability benefits following the termination of their employment does not take away the shock, fear, confusion and overall pain associated with this outcome, one that was made for them, not by them (and certainly not one wh...ich was in their overall life plan). While many terminations are often inevitable (particularly in the face of necessary downsizing and restructuring), the right to terminate someone comes with a corresponding expectation that you do so tactfully, respectfully and confidentially. Compassionate execution of such life-changing leadership decisions goes far in mitigating the fears of those affected, allowing them to move forward and move on in a timely and confident manner. http://ow.ly/bWMT50EDAfE #HRCommunity #HealthyWorkplaces #Respect

A simple way for leaders to establish trust and buy-in from their teams is to speak with individuals directly, discreetly and respectfully as soon as concerns arise. #LeadingRespectfully #Workplace #Communication

Remember that we’re only human means that we all make mistakes. A fundamental part of mutual respect is acknowledging this reality in our day-to-day interactions with others. #ReflectionsOnRespect #HRCommunity

If you haven't already listened to the newest podcast from @LoriandLisaHR, I’d encourage you to take the time to listen (and not because I’m the guest speaker, but because of Lori and Lisa's amazing work). I was excited to discuss a timely topic (one that I am very passionate about) which continues to permeate organizations respectful workplace culture. In this podcast on "The Role of the Leader in Building & Maintaining a Respectful Workplace Culture", we delve into issues of workplace dysfunction, conflict, bullying, harassment and poor communication, and discuss how each of us can better resolve these issues in the workplace. Click the link here to listen to the full podcast loriandlisahr.podbean.com. #loriandlisahr #hrpodcast #humanresources #HR #HRcommunity #dynamicworkplaces #TheMIRRORMethod #ReflectionsOnRespect

Disrespect, discrimination and dysfunction are growing issues in today's workplace: as a result, respectful workplace training is more important than ever. However, given the pandemic, the way to deliver and receive this training has evolved. To respond to these circumstances, I have transformed my in-person respectful workplace training into two different types of online education. The first is a self-paced, one-hour video course for teams who are unable to meet together (virtually) at one specific time. The second is a live group webinar, which brings teams together in an online workshop format. Both give you the information you need but in different ways based on your needs. Connect with us to see which training works best for you. https://bit.ly/3gqsh1C #HR #Training #WorkplaceHealth

The stress & uncertainty for staff and leaders alike is at an all-time high. This is true whether we are working virtually or sharing the same workspace. With changing COVID risks & restrictions, financial pressures & family responsibilities, many of us find that we are more easily triggered by others’ mistakes, lack of responsiveness, insensitive comments or disruptive behaviours than ever before. Given our impatience, fatigue & stress levels, we risk responding to workplace... issues in an emotional & reactive manner, which only serves to make the situation worse, not better. While we cannot control the circumstances around us, we can control how we respond. In this two-hour virtual session, Marli will use her expertise in respectful workplace communication & conflict resolution, to give you tips on how to navigate pressure cooker situations & communicate in a measured manner. Marli will show you how to become adept at speaking & listening in a manner that will help resolve day-to-day issues in the workplace. Even in the midst of uncertainty and change, we can cultivate a culture of respect & support one respectful conversation at a time. Contact us today to learn more about this webinar training https://bit.ly/3lGtIby #Online #Conflict #Training

Ask before you assume. Then listen before you decide. Being fair is as important as being right. #HumanResources #FairnessFirst

In my experience, workplace conflicts often arise because those causing the issues don’t appreciate how they may be coming across or the impact they are having on others (stress, embarrassment, frustration to name a few). Very few fall in the category of what this article calls Aware-Don’t Care. In view of this, the first step, in most situations, is to have a 15-minute MIRROR conversation to respectfully reflect back to someone how they showed up in a given situation (ev...en unintentionally so) and the disruptive effects of this on you or your team (if you’re the leader). If the disruption continues, the conversation must move from one of building awareness to one (facilitated by workplace leaders) that imposes expectations and consequences. Persistently disrespectful, inconsiderate or rude communication is inexcusable in today’s workplace. Allowing someone to engage in this behaviour after being told to stop either because they continue to lack insight into their actions or they don’t care about the effect of their behaviour on those around them - is as inexcusable as the behaviour itself. http://ow.ly/Z4R750Cm5wG #SelfAware #Workplace #Conflict

Happy Halloween

Talk to your team. Good news? Bad news? Share it all. Then listen to what they have to say. Open dialogue is critical to building trust and respect. #Healthy #Teams #LeadingRespectfully

This is really helpful advice and is more relevant than ever with so many of us working from home. As the article points out Duke Medical School’s Imke Kirste recently found that silence is associated with the development of new cells in the hippocampus, the key brain region associated with learning and memory. In the virtual and WFH world, there is so much constant stimulation emails, texts, virtual meetings, social media feeds, family requests, the list goes on. To increase our creativity and reduce our stress, it is important for us to take time outs - deliberately shut down the outside world and seek out some silence. At a recent retreat, I saw a sign that so aptly said silence is a nap for the mind. And a well-deserved one at that. http://ow.ly/VbOY50CfMZd #Healthy #Workplace

For those of you who work with me, this article describes key attributes of Perfectionist Pat (PP) one of the five most common disruptive personas that I see in the workplace. PP is a knowledgeable, committed employee who does excellent work but can’t stay in their own lane. PP creates unhelpful disruption in the workplace by helping others out without such assistance being necessary, sought or wanted. Despite having no formal authority over others, they offer unsol...icited and unwelcomed advice/criticism (sometimes disrespectfully by delivering it in a condescending manner and/or in front of others); they interfere and intervene in others’ tasks, they monitor and evaluate what others are doing and then step in to fix something that is usually not broken. As the article points out, these employees are not simply over-eager they are often highly disruptive and disrespectful to their peers (regardless of how well intentioned they might be). Disruptive performance by even your highest performers - needs to be addressed through clear boundary setting and imposition of consequences when those boundaries are persistently ignored and violated. http://ow.ly/4ilU50C37Ux #Workplace #HealthyOffice #CoWorkers

#CanadaRemembers #RemembranceDay

As this well-informed article points out, bullying happens most commonly by those with high levels of narcissism (excessive self-interest and entitlement). The author describes a trio of behaviours that are associated with narcissists called the Triple E: exploitation (of others), entitlement (feeling the world owes them something) and empathy impairment (they are unable or unwilling to care about the feelings of those around them). The only way to stop bullying behaviour is ...to start imposing consequences on those who engage in it. At an individual level, this might mean to stop engaging with them beyond what is absolutely necessary to get the job done. At an organizational level, leaders must start to address and end unacceptable behaviours not through group training or professional coaching but through actual, real life consequences, like suspensions, demotions and outright dismissals. It’s amazing how quickly someone can change their behaviour when their relationship, job or income depends on it. http://ow.ly/9amW50C9rW8 #Workplace #Bullying

Respect means having your input sought and considered not necessarily agreed with or acted upon. #ReflectionsOnRespect #Opinions #Leadership

This article points out the importance of bystander involvement and intervention in the face of sexual harassment and offers some helpful strategies (such as distracting or removing one of the parties involved in the exchange). In BC, bystanders are legally mandated to confidentially report harassment that they have observed, even if they do not feel comfortable intervening on their own. A robust harassment-prevention strategy must ensure that bystanders at all levels of an organization are properly trained in how to meet their practical and legal obligations. This is one area in which we still have a lot of work to do. http://ow.ly/CSFV50BWSDA #Workplace #Harassment #HR

Respectful teams incorporate tolerance for differences and eliminate unreasonable pressure to conform. #ReflectionsOnRespect #CoWorkers #Health

Join my complimentary webinar, the 3Ms of Respectfully Leading a Respectful Team: Modeling, Monitoring and Mitigating, next week. We will address important information about the new Bill C-65 and how this bill will be expanding the Canada Labour Code regarding specific laws against harassment. To learn more, please contact my assistant, Shelley Hoffmann, at 1-877-590-8153 or [email protected]. #Webinar #Workplace #Harassment

Leaders cannot justify disrespect on the basis of staff performance or behaviour. Defensible accountability is respectful and professional. #Business #Leadership #LeadingRespectfully

In my years of working with staff, the leadership traits that are most appreciated (and most missed in their absence) are caring, sharing and listening. While important, each of these must be exercised with caution, consistency and authenticity, keeping in mind the importance of personal and professional boundaries in the workplace. Staff aren’t stupid. They pick up on leaders who become too personal with their staff in an effort to become more popular. They also pic...k up on leaders who suddenly care about them on the heels of a promotional competition or the week before their 360-degree review. They also know when the caring only applies to one or two staff members, commonly known as the chosen ones. Warmth towards your team matters as long as it’s broadly applied and genuinely delivered. Keep it real. Faux warmth becomes really cold, really quickly. http://ow.ly/urzM50BRLV5 #HR #Leadership #Workplace

Happy #Thanksgiving #Canada

While senior leaders need to apologize and make amends for workplace abuses such as racial and sexual harassment, it is critical to consider and review their own actions and inaction concerning these matters. In this case, did the CEO know or should he have known about the serious transgressions that unfolded under his watch? Being wilfully blind to unacceptable behaviours, decisions and processes that led to toxic workplace culture and then blaming subordinates for their betrayal is inconsistent with strong, ethical and courageous leadership. In these circumstances, saying sorry is often too little too late. http://ow.ly/zT2650BIey5 #Workplace #Harassment

Separating people at the workplace is not the answer to workplace bullying. Accountability and consequences are. #ReflectionsOnRespect

"Understanding" another person's perspective does not require you to agree with it. #Leadership #FairnessFirst

Many organizations, like Trader Joe’s, will face public scrutiny and costly damage to their reputations if they are seen as failing to act (or act appropriately) in the face of sexual, racial or personal harassment complaints. While they should not adjudicate the outcome of such serious complaints on the basis of group petitions or popular opinion, they must consider and respond to concerns about their investigative process. In this case, apparently dismissing a complaint sim...ply because it is he said/she said is not acceptable. Most sexual harassment occurs in situations where there are no witnesses. This is not a reason to ignore complaints, nor does it mean that conflicting stories about a complaint cancel each other out. It requires organizations to objectively consider what happened, assess the credibility of those involved, make an informed judgment call on what most likely happened and then act accordingly. http://ow.ly/pJfo50BDoOD #Workplace #Harassment

In many bullying and harassment investigations, leaders respond that they did not know what was going on amongst or between specific employees. For any investigation to be comprehensive, the organization needs to ask the leader two questions: first, Is that true? Did you really not know this was happening? and second, Even if you did not know, should you have known based on your role and responsibilities as a leader? I hope that these questions will form part of the Fort... Hood review. If they are not asked and answered, then investigations of this nature and their outcomes become mere band-aids and will fail to remedy longstanding institutional wounds. http://ow.ly/oX1G50BuUeg #Bullying #Harassment

Is this Workplace Bullying? Acts that persistently undermine or deliberately impede someone’s work could be viewed as a form of bullying. #FairnessFirst