Lisa Savage
629 Water St, Suite 12 E1N 4B9 Miramichi, NB, Canada

‘Tis the season! Do your stress and anxiety levels start to increase as the holiday season approaches? I think it is quite common for this festive time of year to bring up difficult emotions as we add more to our already busy schedules, to purchase gifts, prepare food, and host family and friends (maybe less so this year with Covid!). I remember a Christmas not too long ago when I was feeling depressed, overwhelmed, and stressed, and I realized that something had to give i...f I was going to enjoy the holiday season. Here is what I found worked for me during that especially stressful period and that I am trying to carry with me every year: Try not to compare with others or with yourself, even from previous years. Focus on doing the best you can with what you have at this time and let good enough be good enough. Decide what is most important and focus on doing a good job on that. Some years I am not able to send out holiday cards, which bothered me until I decided that it was not the make or break of my holiday season and, if it lightened my load that year, it had to go. Accept help. Part of this for me was remembering that my ultimate goal is to bring magic and joy to my children and family, which meant I had to lower my expectations and let them help (ie: baking, decorating, shopping). Especially with my children - their excitement at being part of it all is worth the bit of stress I felt at having to put aside my perfectionistic tendencies. Stay focused on the feelings you want to have (ie: the magic of my children wishing for Santa and their elf): Instead of a burden, see the busy aspects of the season and your ability to prepare for all of this as a blessing. Make a budget of what you’ll spend on gifts for each person and then try to stick to that budget. At least for me, the after-holiday credit card remorse is a real downer after all that hard work to make a beautiful experience for your family and self over the holidays. Make a list of....EVERYTHING!!! Seriously, I’d be lost without my many lists! Getting all the tasks out of your head and onto paper can be a big stress reliever because it removes the pressure of having to remember it all. These are the holiday saver tips that worked for me. Do any of these resonate with you? Do you have tips and tricks that help lighten your load during the holidays? I hope you all have a wonderful holiday season!

Have you ever made a decision to not do something because of fear of the what if’s? I know I have...I almost didn’t pursue my counselling degree because of the negative, fear-filled what if thoughts that consumed me at times. When we are anxious and afraid we often tell ourselves that by predicting the negative outcomes we are staying safe and preparing ourselves for potential disappointment. But who’s to say that the outcome won’t be the positive results we really want...? How do we know that the positive what if’s are not as likely to occur as the negative ones that we make up in our mind? And, ultimately, even if the outcome is not as we hoped, by living in fear of the future we steal our peace and joy in the present moment. After all, If the negative result does occur in the future, why go through that hardship twice: in our current anxiety and anticipation of it happening, and again in the future when (IF) it happens? See more

This morning, as I reflected on a weekend filled with reasons to be grateful, I thought about how beneficial gratitude can be but also how the pressure to feel grateful can feel like a lot sometimes. My best friend and I once started a challenge with each other to text every day with three things for which we were grateful. We did this for 8 months and I loved this experience. On the days when things were stressful, or not going so well, sometimes I had to look harder to find... my gratitude but there was something in everyday that I could give thanks for and I appreciated the push from my friend to dig deeper and find something good in all the stress. But I also know that sometimes the push to be grateful or positive can feel overwhelming. As much as gratitude is beneficial for us, we also need to be ok with what we are feeling right in this moment, even when it’s far from grateful, and not scold ourselves for this. I find it helps to acknowledge and accept when my gratitude is hard to find, and allow myself to feel how I do right now...even the negative feelings...and then I am better able to move through that feeling and not get stuck there. When I tell myself I shouldn’t feel a negative emotion because of all that I have to be grateful for in my life, I am saying that my feelings are unjustified. I often end up feeling more resentment or shame than if I had taken the time to accept and honor that I need to experience a whole range of emotions and moving through these is ok. While I will always promote gratitude as a benefit in everyone’s life I will also support you when your gratitude is harder to find and when you need to just sit with whatever emotion you are feeling right now. See more

Do you ever compare yourself to others? Do you ever tell yourself you’ll be happier or like yourself more once you are more like someone else or have the same things as another person? I know I have done this before and still do. The result is that I then think less of myself, engage in negative and critical self-talk, and feel that I need to be constantly working to modify something about myself to be like someone else. Can you relate to this? The problem with this is that w...hen our worth and self-image are tied up in being less of ourselves and more like another, we are engaged in an unattainable and endless goal because each of us will always be unique. I know cultural and social pressure impacts our tendency to compare but, when you stop and think about it, what makes the qualities of the person we are comparing ourselves to better than us and our qualities? They are not better just because they are different, just as our own way of being/looking/doing is not better - each of us is enough as we are! You are neither worse nor better than anyone else. You are unique - just like everyone else. Choose to think differently - Jenni Schaefer

Recently, while looking through photos my coworker took of my office for our clinic website, I was especially drawn to this picture of the chair I sit in during sessions with clients. It got me thinking about how much I love my work as a counsellor and how grateful I am for the opportunity to be (in this chair) with clients as they share with me and as we work together to try and relieve their distresses and difficulties - and celebrate their successes! As I learn and grow as a counsellor, I appreciate that clients trust me with their stories, and I bring with me (to this chair) an open heart and mind and a desire to help others and to give my best to each client every time we are together. Thank you for this opportunity!

Just doing some road trip reading ..... I was recently visiting my parents and found the journal I am holding in this photo, which I had written in all the way back in 1995-1996 when I was 12 years old - spanning from grade 6-7. What I found in this book surprised me. The negative self-talk and self-image, and desire to be accepted by others, with which 12 year old me struggled, was very sad to see. Throughout our day we have many thoughts running through our minds. Some of ...these are neutral thoughts, but for many of us we also have a large amount of negative thoughts, such as I am ugly or No one wants to spend time with me. These negative thoughts become so habitual and automatic that we might not even realize we are thinking these things and we begin to believe them to be truths about ourselves, others, and situations. When I revisited my childhood journal I realized it is no surprise that my negative thoughts became so much a part of me when I have been thinking them for over 25 years! But being able to notice the thoughts is the first step to being able to change them and develop more positive or neutral thoughts in their place. Having the compassion to say to ourselves, I have thought this way for a long time so no wonder I believe these negative thoughts so deeply, can help us feel deserving of a new thought pattern and start the process toward challenging and changing the old ones. I have seen firsthand how this can work for myself and others and I can help you experience this as well! Just because you’ve been holding a story about yourself forever doesn’t mean it’s a fact. ~Lisa Olivera

Click the link to see new photos of the Miramichi Counselling Centre that are now up on our website! Looking forward to welcoming you in our new space! https://www.miramichicounsellingcentre.com/photo-gallery

Sometimes asking for help can be hard and sharing personal details of your life with another person can be a vulnerable feeling. With this in mind, I have tried to create a counselling space that is peaceful and welcoming. I invite you to join me and take the first step toward creating positive changes in your life and relationships!

Hello! I wanted to take a minute to talk about insurance coverage. While I do recommend that clients check with their individual insurance provider to confirm they cover counselling from a Registered Social Worker, I wanted to let you all know that I am an approved provider under: Johnson Insurance for the NB Teacher’s Group Medavie Blue Cross Public Service Healthcare Plan (*coverage of RSW as mental health professionals is in place during covid-19)... Please let me know if you have any questions! Thank you!

As we navigate through our own unique covid-19 experiences and situations, some of which are difficult and stressful, try to engage in self-compassion through this journey. Self-compassion asks us to notice when we are having a difficult time, acknowledge what we are experiencing and that others experience this too (ie: we are not defective), and ask how we can care for and comfort ourselves in this moment. Just as you would offer kindness and compassion to your closest friend, it is important to offer this same love to ourselves as we experience the troubles and triumphs in our lives.

I am looking forward to getting back to in-person sessions with clients! Please take a look at the precautions we are taking at Miramichi Counselling Centre as we navigate this new phase. https://www.miramichicounsellingcentre.com/covid-19

I just wanted to send a message of gratitude and say thank you very much to everyone for showing their support by liking, following, and sharing my page and visiting the MCC website!! I appreciate you all so much!!

I am so excited to be joining these women and mental health service providers! Please help spread the word by liking and sharing my page and, while you’re at it, check out our website: www.miramichicounsellingcentre.com