Not Another Sleep Consultant
101-177 Victoria Street North N2H5C5 Kitchener, ON, Canada

I asked if your little one wakes and/or feeds at night and their age bracket. This was an informal poll and is most definitely not scientific in any way! But d...id have nearly 10 thousand responses so will hopefully reassure you that you're not alone. #nightwaking #nightfeeding #nightfeeds #normalisenightwaking #normalisebreastfeedingtosleep #normalisenightwaking #nightimeparenting

A horrible thumbnail to start your day.

I realize many parents would be aghast by this, but it's true. Objective data on sleep shows us how much our babies and toddlers wake and how inaccurate parent ...reports are. Now given how sleep training has been pushed on the basis of parent report, maybe there's a question left for you...??

So often I hear families question how normal their baby's sleep can be. Sleep deprivation is torture after all, right? Let me reassure you: your baby's sleep IS... normal. The problem is that we're being asked to cope with it in a very non-normal way. It is not normal to have only two adults around caring for children, working full time, and taking care of home, health, etc. This is NOT how we evolved to live. Thus the problem is not about our babies, but the culture we find ourselves in that simply fails to provide the support needed for families - children and parents alike - to thrive. #evolutionaryparenting #respectfulparenting #responsiveparenting #nighttimeparenting #gentleparenting #gentlesleep #infantsleepeducation #normalinfantsleep #support #culture #lackofsupport #supportfamilies #cantdoitall

25% off for first 3 families who book Sleep Consults

In case you need to hear this, it's ok to nurse your baby to sleep. For more support please find a FREE virtual meeting here: www.lllc.ca/virtual-meetings-cale...ndar #LLLC #lalecheleaguecanada #nursingtosleep #sleep #support

Understanding your child's sleep can make all the difference in how you approach it. Find out more: http://evolutionaryparenting.com//back-to-basics-sleep-co/

#breastfeeding #toddlerbreastfeeding #breastfeedingmomma

Any questions??

My top tips for getting your head around and accepting normal infant sleep for new and expecting families: 1. Expect that your baby will wake A LOT and want t...o nurse back to sleep most times throughout the first year and beyond. 2. Even if your baby starts sleeping longer Expect it not to last. 3. Expect there to be times when your baby will be super hard to settle and may be impossible to put down. Embrace the beauty of contact napping and the enforced rest it brings or look into your local babywearing group to find a carrier or wrap that enables you to keep moving and hands-free. Continue -https://www.littlesparklers.org/top-tips-for-sleep-for-expe . Vida Images

How can I help?

If you work with families, please make sure you know what the research actually says about sleep training before promoting it or talking to families about it. ...Sadly the claims being made are not all held up by the research. For IBCLCs, this module provides 3 L-CERPs. Find out more here: http://evolutionaryparenting.com//science-and-sleep-train/

Do you know how I know? I’m the child! I got to grow up with a gentle parent and now I can support others. You can make this change in one generation. But YOU need support to do it.

Sounds about right.

credit: Responsive Parenting

This week is #BlackBreastfeedingWeek and since it’s #maternalhealthmonday, we are sharing this beautiful image of fellow mamas feeding their babies. Scary trut...h: Black women are three to four times more likely to die as a result of pregnancy, compared to white women. Their babies suffer an infant mortality rate that more than doubles that of white children, often due to low birthweight, premature birth or complications after birth. Black babies are more likely to be born prematurely than white babies. In 2017, 14 percent of black women gave birth prematurely, significantly more than 9 percent of white women, according to CDC data. That reflects the level of prenatal care black mothers receive. Promoting better maternal care, including educating mothers about the value and practice of breastfeeding, could help reverse some of these trends. Source PBS news : , @_supersavyshots @gemmedbyjewellphotography Thanks to @_wolomi and @districtmotherhued for sharing! Repost from @fit4mom_dc #blackmaternalhealth #blackmamasmatter #supportblackmamas #breastfeedingmonth #normalizebreastfeeding

We were never meant to be doing this alone. We cannot repeat this fact enough. And yet, for many families, this is their reality, particularly this year with ...all that a worldwide pandemic has done to family and social structures. But it serves no one well to minimise the needs of our youngest and most vulnerable people in order to make the ridiculous expectations on their parents (and mother in particular) more manageable. The fact that our babies and toddlers need us so intensely remains. They simply do. And we don’t repeat this to guilt families who are struggling with that. We repeat it because it is essential that we continue to bring light to the unreasonable expectations being placed on families by society. It is inhumane some of the circumstances people are trying to raise their babies under and we must work to change the culture that not only allows it, but tries to make it seem like it is the baby who is at fault when their family crumbles under the weight of all that is demanded of their parent. If you are struggling with lack of support, please take the weight of blame and guilt off your shoulders because it’s not where it belongs. You are struggling like any human would in your shoes. It’s not your baby making life unreasonable, it’s an unsupportive society who places little to no-value in the work needed to raise that baby and simply sees them as an inconvenience for you to manage out so you can do all the other things. We are working really hard to change this and one of the ways we can get there is to not shy away from the truth of the challenge. As Amanda Donnet from Spilt Milk Psychology says, ‘the solution to unrealistic expectations of mothers should not be unrealistic expectations of babies’. We can and will do better for families of the future

Our new home has space to be someone else’s home.

There is a moral imperative to end sleep training. For the health of our babies, AND the health of our parents!!!

Going live tonight at bedtime around 8pm ET as I’m travelling today. Watch her for updates.

So often parents are relieved to hear this. Being told we have to teach our babies something they can't learn is just a set up for feeling like a failure. Pare...nting is hard enough without having other people telling us all the ways we are doing it wrong! Trust your instincts, learn your baby, be with eachother, go from there. #parenting #supporteachother #sootheeachother #andthebabies #winnipegparents

They forgot the part where the solution is to help adults get more sleep, by expecting the adults to be the ones that change lifestyle habits and expectations. ...Writing with a focus on changing babies normal nighttime parenting needs simply needs to stop being the main solution. New paradigm please. Babies, who don’t have the capacity for logic and reason, or self regulation - should not bear the brunt of the change. Adults have the power to change. It’s hard - hard for adults. Why would we expect it to be right and easy for babies? Most haven’t been encouraged to think this way, to take on the challenge, or have been inundated by the sleep industry’s one-sided view of infant’s needs. Most parents have been programmed to distrust their baby, their communication, and their very real needs. Many adults are so far removed from knowing how to meet their own emotional needs that it’s painful to accept that they may need to learn to meet their baby’s same needs. And some just don’t want to spend the emotional energy looking in not out, and may have a hard time accepting that the baby isn’t the sole problem. Whatever the right path is, everyone can make better immediate sleep choices when sleep is prioritized, that don’t in any way prevent meeting the needs of your baby. Families can attempt get more sleep today when they are willing to see it differently. Sometimes a bit more sleep and self care is enough to maintain the really hard and intensive task of parenting babies and children. We will look back on baby training one day with the same what the hell were we thinking that we feel now about other unacceptable but normative neglect tools.

Let's Talk Regressions and Progressions

Oh it’s wayyyy past time.

Assumptions are at the core of my work. Break myths, not habits.

"Imagine my shock when I first learned that generally well-meaning parents were deliberately subjecting their babies to routines that chronically elevated their... cortisol levels. The parents wanted to train their babies to sleep or to be independent. Some of these approaches are worse than others, and the milder forms, will probably not cause any long-term harm if they occur in the context of overall responsive parenting. I’m sure that parents who try these approaches think they are doing the right thing. However, if you understand the physiology, how could chronically raising babies’ cortisol levels by not responding to them possibly be a good idea?" ~ Kathleen Kendall-Tackett in "Why Cry-It-Out Can Be Bad for the Brain," Women's Health Today blog. Dr. Kendall-Tackett is a health psychologist and International Board Certified Lactation Consultant, the owner and Editor-in-Chief of Praeclarus Press, and an Attachment Parenting International Resource Advisory Council Member.

New study shows babies' genes express themselves differently depending on how often they’re held.

Love this! Did you know that there are biological reasons that babies fall asleep at the breast? Nursing to sleep is normal, not a bad habit.

Babies cannot be spoiled. Babies are biologically wired to be connected to their mom. A baby that is held often is not being "coddled." Just stop it already. Ba...bies have a biological NEED both physical and psychological to be with and/or near mom. A mom who meets those needs is not doing anything wrong. She is not making a mistake that she will come to regret later. I don't recall ever thinking back and saying, "I held my baby way too much, how terrible of me." Stop telling moms it's "her fault her baby never wants to be put down" when the baby is displaying normal baby behavior. Yes the baby will eventually walk and explore on their own. Yes , eventually baby will no longer need to be worn. Yes, eventually the baby will grow up and actually enjoy time away from mom and hanging with friends. Stop trying to fast forward the process, why the rush? And especially stop trying to shame moms into thinking they are doing something wrong simply for meeting the biological needs of their babies. See more

Make sleeping with your baby work for you but don’t let anyone tell you it’s not normal. Doesn’t work for you? Then let’s fill your babies needs another way.

Hmmmmmmm think it works with babies?

Changes to sleep are normal. Get help that is only based on babies biological normals!

See you all there!

Thanks for posting, HINTA Hitting Is Never The Answer! We couldn't agree more.

This is tonight!!! See you there.

If they sleep in your bed, they’ll be there forever. Bullshit If you’re still breastfeeding at 2 years old, you’ll still be breastfeeding at high s...chool. Bullshit If you don’t let your newborn learn to fall asleep on their own, you’ll be patting their bum, rocking them, rubbing their back forever. Bullshit Do what feels right for you Listen to your mama instincts Cuddle your baby to sleep Let your upset, scared toddler into your bed at 2am All the unnecessary opinions that create fear in motherhood? They’re bullshit You’ve got this, mama

Every bit of this. Every word. Get real help. Get actual support.

A little thing I wrote for ESRC's Society Now!

This is completely true about sleep!

What is normal sleep? (And could it pick a worse screen?)

Kristina Kuzmic wants moms to push the guilt aside and remember motherhood is hard. Moms, pat yourself on the back, you're doing just fine!

"The pair examined childrearing practices here and in other cultures and say the widespread American practice of putting babies in separate beds even separate... rooms and not responding quickly to their cries may lead to incidents of post-traumatic stress and panic disorders when these children reach adulthood... Parents should recognize that having their babies cry unnecessarily harms the baby permanently... It changes the nervous system so they’re overly sensitive to future trauma. ~Amy https://news.harvard.edu//children-need-touching-and-atte/

Why the heck did I get into Sleep Education?

Self settling is not something that needs to be taught. Sleep is about reaching developmental milestones...and that happens at different times. Cuddle your baby. For more on gentle sleep methods and alternatives to cry it out and sleep training: http://amzn.to/2bVDqZj

Judging an act and judging a person are different. But also, let's really look at the evidence, eh? http://evolutionaryparenting.com/how-dare-you-judge-me-for/

After a 2 year hiatus for health, I am back taking consults. Message me for information!