The Coaching Psychologist
138 18 avenue SE T2G 5P9 Calgary, AB, Canada

What are all the things that you are saying yes to that don't add value, that are not moving the needle on the things that actually mean the most to you? If everything you did in a day were put into your calendar, and if someone looked at that calendar what fair conclusions would they draw about your priorities, your passions, your life? How can you start making your calendar - the spent minutes, hours, and days of your life be a more accurate reflection of who you really... are, your highest values, and the life you want to lead? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ #alignment #mindset #being #authenticliving #bestself #bestlife #personalgrowth #coachingpsychology #professionalcoaching #personaldevelopment See more

Become discerning in the service of your goals ~~~~~~~~~~~ #mindset... #authenticliving #bestself #bestlife #personalgrowth #coachingpsychology #professionalcoaching #personaldevelopment #mindbody #emotionalintelligence #headheartcongruency See more

If you are desiring a more authentic and personally meaningful life begin by gifting yourself moments of alignement. The feelings you experience within these moments will be a benchmark and will serve as navigational guides in the design and creation of your personal version of your best life ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ #mindset... #authenticliving #headheartcongruency #emotionalintelligence #bestself #bestlife #personalgrowth #coachingpsychology #professionalcoaching #personaldevelopment #mindbody See more

Head heart congruency in the service of your desired results

Such empowering truth in this. None of us had any control over the parents we were born to, the home or institution we were raised in, the culture or geography that surrounded us, the era we lived in and were taught by, the experiences or circumstances we encountered or endured as young children. And yet if we are lucky we will live decades upon decades post all these early childhood conditions. These factors are definately informative influences but they need not be determi...nants. It is more than possible to pivot and write a future story line that is intentionally different and unbound by those historical uncontrollables. This requires claiming and owning our personal authority in our life as fully grown adults, it is the fierce task of individuation. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ #authenticity #mindset #growthmindset #individuation #mentalperformance #coachingpsychology #transformationalgrowth #psychology #rewritethestory #professionalcoaching #realself #youarenotwhathappenedtoyou

Role reversal. I am normally on the receiving end of coaching from @shred_sisters coaches, but yesterday, instead of my bike helmet I wore my psychologist hat and talked Mental Performance Coaching for the Coach. Such a pleasure to share the topic and the evening with kind, curious and engaged women, who also love bikes and support other women loving bikes, pushing themselves and playing ... #womensupportingwomen ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ #flannelchickmtb #mentalperformance #mindset #growthmindset #coaching #coachingpsychology #psychology #womensmountainbiking #womensmtb #mountainbike #mountainbikelessons #mountainbiking #mtnbiking #mtb #mtbchicks #mtbgirls #mtblife #ridelikeagirl #girlswhoridebikes #womenonbikes #learningtomountainbike #mtbprogression #winterinthemountains #womeninthemountains #albertamtb #bcmtb #mtbcanada #yycmtb #yyc

It's been my expereince that many people have such a hard time with this message. "Small" daily changes seem underwhelming and yet require so much focus and discipline to execute day after day that many people never see them through long enough to discover the difference these shifts can make. Sometimes when people engage in therapy or coaching they are wanting or expecting lightening bolt transformations. We want big change, and want it now! Apart from the events that turn... our world upside down and force us to rebuild, most change involves development. Personal, life, and professional development is a process occuring across time and circumstances, aided by intention, insight and practice, starting with a single (sometimes bold) step, but a step nontheless. It's interesting how we can resist and struggle against the idea that making small consistent changes to our routine can change our lives. Prefering to think that a lightening bolt striking down our entire life as we know it, is a more desirable method of change ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ #mindset #coachingpsychology #grit#growthmindset #transformationalchange #intentionalliving #valuebasedliving #authenticity

Frank words but worth considering. For all of us who wait to take action until the conditons are perfect, the product or offer is perfected, the time is perfect, or the permission to act is given, keep in mind this may not be excellence driving us, but rather fear ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ #mindset... #professionalcoaching #coachingpsychology #boldmoves #takeaction #outsidethecomfortzone #brendonbuchard See more

This may be one of the simplest yet most profound questions we can sit with, and revisit throughout the changing seasons of our life. What is this precious moment, day, month, new year and next chapter most about for you? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ #professionalcoaching #lifecoaching #coachingpsychology #mentalperformance... #intentionalliving #mindset #authenticity See more

Some reasons the holidays just might not feel merry and bright * Recent loss of a loved one * A previous loss that coincides with the holiday season * First holidays without a loved one due to death, divorce, or estrangement * Job loss, unemployment and financial stress... * Food poverty * Unable to be with friends or family during holidays due to logistics or distance * Serious illness or injury personal or loved one *Pre-existing mood or anxiety disorder * Personal history of difficult, unhappy or traumatic holidays * Crisis of faith and doubting one's previous meaning of the holiday * Unhealthy or conflictual family relationships * Social isolation * Felt preasure to meet other's expectations during the holidays * Perfectionism and unrealistic expectations about the holidays Know that you are not alone in feeling sad, overwhelmed, or disappointed during the holidays. Unlike what we see on social media the holidays can be a difficult time for many reasons and for many people. Remember it's okay for the goal this year to be simply "getting through" the season. It's okay to give yourself permission to opt out of traditions and to experiment with designing a different kind of holiday this year. Pay attention to the basics like routine, sleep, feeding yourself, fresh air and gentle excercise, and moderate your substance use, which can exacerbate intense emotions and low mood. And please talk to someone if you are feeling particulary depressed or unsafe #psychology #coaching #holidayblues #copingduringtheholodays #mentalperfromance #professionalcoaching

Confidence & Self Worth: At it's simplest Self Worth can be thought of as the quality of our relationship with our real self. Whereas confidence is born from our assessment (valid or invalid) regarding our ability to execute on something. It is easy for these concepts to be confused or become entangled. But they are different, and growing and nurturing them requires different approaches. Confidence should be domain specific, and at it's healthiest grows as we gain evidence... of our ability to execute. Our self worth requires clarity regarding our inherent value and requires an unwavering practice of honouring that value. Grow confidence, reconnect with worth. #mindset #confidence #selfworth #mentalperformance #coaching #psychology #professionalcoach See more

It's important to know what is of high value in your life. And it's critical to be clear when what is of value, is also time sensitive. There are things that just won't wait for you to "find the time". Get clear and get on it. #professionalcoaching #mindset #mentalperformance... #valuebasedliving #value#values #bestlife #authenticliving #coachingpsychology See more

Whether it is in business, or your personal life how might you begin to trust that when you are clear about your offer your tribe will find you? As a Registered Psychologist there are many standards of practice that guide my daily work and that are quite unique to the practice of professional psychology. For instance one of those is not using client testimonials in the marketing of my services. There are many reasons this can be problematic within a therapeutic relationship.... But because I am also a Professional Certified Coach this can be limiting. In the coaching world EVERYONE uses testimonials, and in fact many coaches lead with these testimonials. Webpages and Coach social media pages are proliferated with glowing client endorsements. Clients looking for a Coach can understandably be persuaded by this "evidence" of capacity, and the lack of testimonials might easily be interpreted as evidence to the contrary. In psychology terms we call this "social proof", and it can often be the deciding factor for people in the selection of who to work with when they might be wavering. However the reasons for this standard of practice for Psychologists are undeniably valid and ultimately in the interest of public protection. So although from a business perspective it is likely limiting, it forces me to trust that my unique offer will find its way to the specific clients who are meant to be on my path, and I on theirs. It requires that I trust "that my professional vibe will attract my professional tribe" #Psychology #mentalperformance #professionalcoaching #mindset #mentalperformance #professionalpsychology #lifecoaching

Mindset "magic wand". On occasion I receive a referral from an athlete or parent of an athlete wanting urgent help to prepare mentally for an important game, race, meet, or competition happening "next week". Often this is reactive to not feeling prepared, or not getting the desired results and deciding to "try anything" in an effort to improve outcomes. There is a hope or belief that the psychologist can say or do something to flip a switch for the athlete. Although there ...are some very basic concepts that can be introduced in a single session or two, the fact is mental performance training is a dynamic and collaborative process. Mastery over mindset often requires developing insight and dedicating practice to the new mental tools being taught. In the same way that you would not expect to be able to learn a new complex athletic skill in a few days and then expect to successfully execute it under the demands of a high stake competition, you also cannot expect to learn to master your thoughts and emotions or hone your mental game overnight. Mental preparation requires a routined practice leading up to competition. And mental toughness like any strong muscle requires specific training. Ideally athletes will incorporate mental training into their overall routine in the same way dryland training, nutrition, stretching, and rest are considered critical aspects of preparation. Because as of yet there is no mindset "magic wand" #sportpsychology #mindset#coaching #mentalperfromance #professionalcoaching #psychology #coaching #athletepreperation #peakperformance

Beware our primitive or sometimes called lizzard or reptilian brain cares nothing about our living a joyous, purposeful, fulfilled or inspired life. Its task is simple, to keep the organism that we are, alive for as long as possible. We should appreciate this part of our brain. None of us would likely have made it past toddlerhood without it. But it cannot be given veto power over our rational mind, our heart or our higher self. If given the choice it would have us living l...ife in a very small bubble, completely safe and sound from any and all risk - real or imagined #mentalperformance #professionalcoaching #lifecoaching #sportpsychology #coachingpsychology #fear#anxiety #mindset

"The offside parent". We have all seen and heard them at the rink, on the sidelines, or in the parking lot loading up the gear bag. And if honest we can probably recognize times when we meant well but might have crossed the helpful line with our own young athletes. Some basic practices for not engaging in "offside parenting" 1. Leave the technical advice and performance deconstruction to your child's coaches. Take the role of a cheerleader. It's a tough role, remember cheer...leaders have to encourage and cheer louder when the team is down 2. Begin noticing and praising attitude & effort (in your child and in others) 3. Always choose your long term relationship with your child over your desire/need to coach their performance. One day you won't be a "soccer, hockey or dance parent" you will just be a parent. What quality of relationship do you want to have with your child? Put your focus and efforts there. 4. Foster a growth mindset environment- if you don't know what that is, as a parent and especially as a parent of an athlete you need to learn, it's important. 5. When in doubt bite your tongue, say nothing, and offer a hug or high-five 6. Let your child know you are there to help, advise, debrief but only if they specifically request it from you #sportpsychology #parenting #parentingathletes #growthmindset #mindset #mentalperfromance #parentinginsport #coaching#grit #professionalcoaching

What will people think? And nowadays what will people comment/say? When we are afraid that we might not be liked or accepted, or that we may face criticism, when we are tempted to hold back for fear of rejection or ridicule, when we silence ourselves to hide from the possible "haters" we might start by acknowledging it feels mighty vulnerable to put ourselves out there! And then with some lightness we might remind ourselves that even people like Ghandi, Nelson Mandela, Mother... Teresa and Martin Luther King have some serious critics out there! So let's be honest with ourselves, if after their efforts in this world they can't get everyone on side, what makes the rest of us think we stand a chance Let it go, our egos may prefer unanimous approval, but we don't need it to be okay. You got this, keep shining your bright light! #mindset #mentalperformance #coaching #coachingpsychology #sportpsychology #bestself#authenticity #vulnerability

To my friends, family and clients who follow my business pages and loyally click the and buttons a big Thank You! Maintaining a social media presence is one of many components of self employment these days. Please know your engagement is a form of encouragement and support. Thanks for cheering me and my work on with your clicks, positive comments and shares! Instagram @thecoachingpsychologist FBThe Coaching Psychologist

Fearless? Or brave? Sometimes we describe people in our lives or in the media as fearless. This is a compliment. An adjective that acknowledges their ability to attempt or execute on something that would have many of us wetting our pants But I think this word may unintentionally overlook the extraordinary mental and physical efforts that proceed looking fearless. People with a "typical" brain in fact are not without fear. Fear is hardwired in us, and is protective. Those wh...o may appear fearless have actually challenged that hard wiring within themselves, they have moved themselves through successive progression, often years of disciplined mental and physical practice, they have faced and worked through anxiety, physical fear, self doubt, uncertainty, injury and managed setbacks to a level of accomplishment and mastery that now makes what they do look easy. Maybe the adjective brave better acknowledges all that grit? Photo: Rider Connor White @ 13y/o sessioning "no handers" #fearless#bravery #grit #sportpsychology #growthmindset #mentalperformance #professionalcoaching #mindset#coaching #psychology #findyourbrave #mtb#mountainbike #mountainbikeskills #whistlerbikepark

Anxiety 101 When anxiety kicks in it can be helpful to know that anxiety creates a very specific filter/lens. Anxiety overestimates the risk and threat (ie the "bad outcome") AND simultaneously underestimates our resources, skill and ability to cope. This dynamic predisposes us to the automatic avoidance, fight, flight, freezing response. Recognition that we are seeing and feeling things through this tainted lens of anxiety means we can challenge our automatic response by ...gathering more factual and accurate information about the actual level of risk. We can challenge the lens that magnifies the shadow. #Anxiety #fear #professionalcoaching #mindset #mentalperformance #psychology #CBT

One of the many benefits of practicing the "power of the pause" is the opportunity to pivot. The pause allows space for choice to surface between the default, automatic, patterned way of being or trajectory, and a new alternative. #coachingpsychology #mindset #mentalperfromance... #intentionalliving #professionalcoaching See more

Sorrow shared is sorrow divided". Perhaps much worse than saying "the wrong thing" to someone who is grieving, is to say nothing.

I am often asked "Can people really change?" Change can occur when the desire to create something new is so powerful we are driven by its' pull, or when the current result is so unsatisfying we are pushed to escape it. Change happens when we are pulled towards the new possibilities, or repelled by the old status quo. In change work we understand this and can harness the power of both forces to work in service of our dreams, goals & our best self #professionalcoaching... #goals #mentalperformance #sportpsychology #personalgrowth #bestself #change See more

Mental Gear. The ultimate goal may very well be to "summit". However 99.9 % of the mountain that must be successfully navigated lies below the summit. This is where the most time, effort and energy will be spent and where the most setbacks will occur. Anticipating, accepting & preparing for the unique mental, behavioural and emotional demands and challenges at these various levels in the climb (ie your goal) is the mindset equivalent of packing the necessary and appropriat...e gear for the climb #mentalperformance #professionalcoaching #mindset #goals #sportpsychology See more

Self care because it is easier to show up kindly and generously when our needs are met. Care for yourself and trust that in doing so your wellness, vitality, and joy will benefit those you come into contact with #selfcare #professionalcoaching #selfcompassion

The therapeutic relationship is often misunderstood. It is not a social or reciprocal one. If it were a therapist would spend half the session talking about their hopes, hurts, fears, frustrations, and goals. It is by design a professional and predominantly one sided relationship, aimed at identifying and meeting the needs and goals of the client. Any good therapist knows from the very first session they are working themselves out of a job with their client. #professionalcoaching

In thoughtful memory of a kind bright soul who left this physical life suddenly and all too soon. Whose untimely passing reminds me to spend my minutes, hours and days intentionally and in allignment with my truest values. To choose in favour of joy and love not worry and fear. To keep the trivial in perspective and to practice gratitude. And to forever be mindful that not everyone gets the opportnuity to grow old.

When the chase for happiness becomes the source of our unhappiness https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=e9dZQelULDk

Acceptance. Only when we have grieved the loss, acknowledged and felt the anger of injustice, named and leaned into the disappointment of a lost possibility, or the frustration in being blocked from our preferred trajectory can we then begin to reframe our experiece, find the greater lessons, and reconcile with our reality. We must first be patient and brave enough to let ourselves feel vulnerable, to be mindful of our pain and suffering. These feelings come to teach us. Acknowledge them, name them, sit with them, be curious about them and open up to their guidance. In doing so these emotions can then begin to shift and flow, allowing space to be created for the eventual state of acceptance. #professionalcoaching #emotionalmindfulness #positivepsychology

When did being average become such a bad thing? Living our best life does not necessarily require constant striving to be an outlier. Satisfaction, fulfilment, gratitude, purpose, meaning, and joy are not limited to the ends of the curve. In fact the majority of really good people and rewarding experiences are found under the mean area. "Not average" does not necessarily equate with better, it's simply less occurring. In my work I often see how the current distaste for average eliminates many meaningful possibilities for peoples lives. In a trend and desire to be "anything but average" doors are being closed. Want to be unique or exceptional? Have the courage to live your personal version of your best life regardless of where it might plot under the curve

Never too old to learn & joie de vivre! I believe one of the reasons so many of us loose our energy and vitaility throughout life is that as adults we frequently take ourselves off the learning curve. As children so much of everything we do is a new experience. Each September brings a new school year with fresh challenges, each developmetal stage has us stretching, striving to meet the demands of the new tasks we face. We are in a perpetual growth and learning state. Real ...learning requires us to be an open and active participant, to use our senses, to be curious and fully plugged in. The feeling of aliveness and the expereince of flow is nourished under these mindful conditions. Our societal structures can easily take us out of this natural state. We "grow up", finish school, and think we are done with our learning, and can now settle in and finally focus on "real life". But we are not meant to be sidelined, to stop developing and learning just because our bodies have stopped growing, or we have completed our formal education or we have reached a "certain age". Vitality must be nourished. Plant the seeds by learning something new, choose to be curious again, put yourself in unchartered territory where your senses must be sharp, challenge yourself mentally, push yourself physically. Go find your smile! Photo: Me 47 y/o practicing what I preach while learning downhill and XC mountain biking this season #professionalcoaching#growthmindset#sportpsychology#findingflow#whistlerbikeprk#learningtomountainbike#nevertoooldtolearn See more

Yes it is true that some people out there have had it easier than you. Yes it is also true that some people out there have had it harder than you. And so now what? ... #grit#growthmindset #professionalcoaching Credit: #Lorideschene#tinybuddha

It's about what you do after the fall

"It takes a man to feel... it takes balls to cry. Man up, speak up."

Simple in concept but challenging in execution - Life practices to aspire to #professionalcoaching#growthmindset#sportpsychology Image credit: #creativemomista

For many people (if open to it) there is a shift around this time of life. An internal unsettling, a drive to challenge the restrictions created by our socialized self. A desire to grow and live based on who we authentically are, rather than based on who we have been taught we should be. For many it's not until around this time that we have accumulated enough life experience (trial and error research ) that we begin to actually know ourselves. When brave enough we can begin to contemplate life choices based on this new awareness and design a life that is in allignment with the real self #Repost@Rebranding Middle Age

If a stranger were to look at your calendar would they be able to tell who and what is of highest value in your life based on how you spend the minutes, and hours of your days? Image credit: @projecthappiness_org #professioanalcoaching #valuebasedliving

Hero's journey. Every interesting story, book, or film requires the hero to accept a call to action, and to face failure or defeat before succeeding. Why would your life be any different?

Did you play today? Grown-ups need recess too. The benefits of play for adults are numerous and well documented. Write your own permission slip and go have some fun #mentalperformance #professionalcoaching #benefitsofplay

Words have power - especially those spoken from coaches, teachers, & mentors. How do your words land on those you are charged with influencing? Illustration credit: @lunarbaboon #professionalcoaching #sportpsychology #mentalperformancecoaching