Sara Notenboom, M.A., Registered Psychotherapist
507 Lakeshore Rd E Suite 216 L5G 1H9 Mississauga, ON, Canada

Because healing always occurs in the space of attuned presence. #psychotherapy #therapy #counselling #safety #presence #love #loved #healing #healingfromtrauma #holdspaceforhealing #relationship #nurture #innerchildhealing #innerchild #grounding #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #attachment #attachmentfigure #purpose #loveheals #fear #mississauga #portcredit #myportcredit #gta #toronto #canada

Never forget that your life is your masterpiece. You don't need anyone's permission to go after what expands your heart and excites your soul. There is no such thing as "too much" "too little" "weird" "eccentric" "not enough" because those words are merely opinions, not facts. ... The gift of your life is the ability that you have to choose. You have the privilege of choosing how you spend your time, and who you spend it with. You get to paint with the colours of your choosing. And yes, there will be parts of your masterpiece that might be darker, and painted by the hand of life rather than by you. Those colours might be less joyous, dampened by pain and tragedy, but never forget, that if we allow it to, pain can transform us, and allow us to eventually shine brighter- more authentically. The dark colours eventually give rise to the brighter ones. Because here's the thing, we need our pain. We need it to help us grow, expand, reflect, re-prioritize, and eventually embrace. To embrace the notion that it takes all colours to make a masterpiece truly beautiful. Because as you come to reflect on your masterpiece you come to realize that the darker colours, they are sacred and beautifully transformative. Those colours- they deserve to be witnessed. Please don't spend your time painting something other people think you should. Please know that your masterpiece is supposed to look unique, because it supposed to be yours and yours alone. There are no rules to creating it, even if some continue to tell you that there are. Love deeply. Take the time to be present. FOLLOW YOUR INTERNAL KNOWING. PLEASE. Tell fear it is wrong. Tell fear that you are stronger and that there is no way that you are going to allow it to stop you from painting with the brightest colours. Then tell it again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. (*repeat as needed*) Here's to painting with unapologetic abandon. Your masterpiece is yours. DON'T YOU EVER FORGET THAT. So, please if you do anything, go CLAIM YOUR LIFE, RIGHT NOW. #psychotherapy #therapy #counselling #success #successmindset #risk #risktaker #mindset ##mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mississauga

Take the time to really see people. Like really see them, because to see another human being for exactly who they are is the single greatest gift you could ever offer another person, for THAT is what we are ALL wishing and hoping for, underneath it all. It has come to be my belief through the work that I have done as a crisis line worker, support group facilitator, educational assistant, mentor, psychotherapist and college professor for the last 10years, that we as humans ar...e starved. We are starving for authentic connection- to be seen and embraced without fear of judgment or ridicule. To be given the permission to take off the masks we wear each day that have unfortunately, become impairative to day-to-day functioning. To be lovingly embraced and metaphorically (and sometimes literally) held while we courageously reveal the most tender (vulnerable, shame-filled, humiliating, embarrasing etc.) parts of our life stories. To be validated, even in the face of opposing views. To be unconditionally accepted and to be seen as more than a series of " bad" behaviours or "poor" choices. To be seen as more than a label. To be met with the understanding that anger, and defensiveness are symptoms of hurt and fear. To be met with the knowing that all behaviours serve as an attempt to meet some basic and inherently human need. To be met with the knowing that all behaviour is either loving or a call for love. Always. To see someone is to love them fiercely and completely. To see someone is to cultivate a space for healing, and ultimately, for freedom. People often ask me how I can do my job. How I can listen to stories of pain, suffering, trauma and tragedy all day. But to be honest as heart breaking as those stories can be to bear witness to, those are not the things that stick with me. What sticks with me are those experiences in which someone has told me the details of their life story (including all the tender parts) and then they reveal that I am the only one to know that information about them. (Continued in comments...)

"How bold one gets when one is sure of being loved." - Sigmund Freud Ah, the magic and empowerment of secure connection. Time and time again, people talk to me about their desire to be completely independent, self-reliant, and self-sufficient. I typically follow their assertions with questions of how they feel this might be helpful to them, and what kind of benefit they feel it will provide them and what has influenced them to believe that radical self-reliance is indicativ...e of mental health and psychological wellbeing. While individual stories may differ, a common theme I hear is that society tells us that to be considered successful we need to learn to be totally self-reliant. I hear that there is a sense of shame around relying on others, asking for support or help for fear of becoming dependent. And while I wholeheartedly agree that total dependence on others may point to underdeveloped parts of the self, the presence of fear, self-doubt and insecurity, looking to others for support can actually help to foster independence and personal empowerment. I invite people to ponder on the notion of interdependence. That is, the idea that for us to truly claim our independence, we need to be securely rooted in relationships with others. Allow me to explain... It is only through cultivating and maintaining connections with others that we are truly able to commit to what makes us shine. It is through knowing that we have people in our lives in front of whom we can show our authentic selves that we are truly able to risk, and reach beyond our comfort zone. We need to know that we have certain people in our lives who are 100% behind us to facilitate our personal expansion. Without having these people, the risks become too big and too fear provoking, because we run the risk of being completely shattered and deflated if the outcome is not favourable. We need these people in our lives to remind us that a failure or a mistake has absolutely no bearing on our worth and that we are still just as inherently valuable and lovable as we were before we fell on our face. Relational security fosters personal empowerment. Strive for interdependence.