West Coast Centre for Sex Therapy

Courtesy of @SWatercolour For anybody who knows what is it to feel depressed or chronically anxious, it can seem like it will never end. But it almost always does, sometimes sooner, sometimes later.... #depression #anxiety

One of our associates, Cara Dunkley, has a new first-authour publication out in Current Sexual Health Reports. Congratulations! Eating Disorders and Sexual Function Reviewed: A Trans-diagnostic, Dimensional Perspective The article reviews the scientific research on sexual function difficulties in relation to eating disorders, and provides a theoretical framework for understanding the association between these two important health concerns.... Given the prevelance of body image concerns and societal pressures/consequences of the 'Western beauty ideal,' this article has relevance for people without an eating disorder diagnosis who struggle with problematic eating behaviours or poor body esteem. Not surprisingly, there is a connection between poor body esteem and difficulties with sexual functioning. If you feel crappy about your body and fear what partners might think, having sex is going to be anxiety-provoking. And anxiety has a well-established negative impact on sexual enjoyment and functioning. Here's the link to the article if you're curious to check it out: http://ow.ly/ZJan50zsiBa

Despite the extraordinary circumstances that we find ourselves in, our team is committed to serving our clients. WCCST is open for business over video, and we’re accepting new clients. We want to make sure that our clients can still get the help they need, while we also do our part to slow the spread of COVID-19.... The health and safety of our clients and community is paramount to us. As such, our team is offering therapy over encrypted video as a temporary solution in response to COVID-19. While video can feel a little clunky and awkward at first, research has shown that it’s as effective as meeting in person. So if you’re looking for help, please get in touch. We’d be happy to see you over video. Wishing you and your loved ones good health.

Women are from Venus and men are from Mars: most people are familiar with this saying, which is intended to illustrate how different men and women are. What we now know to be true, however, is that there are more differences among men and among women, than between men and women. But, there are some things that are distinctly different; one of those things being men’s and women’s responses to erotic media. When men view erotic media - aka, porn - they tend to get aroused watc...hing the gender/sex they're sexually attracted to, whereas they do not become aroused by their non-desired gender/sex. This goes for both gay and straight men. Women, on the other hand, tend to become physiologically aroused in response to anything sexual, regardless of their sexual orientation. This can even include animals having sex. Now this doesn’t mean that women WANT to have sex with everything! Physiological sexual arousal response is not the same as psychological desire or arousal. Several studies have shown that women have what’s called lower mind-body concordance than men. What this means is that sometimes there can be a disconnect between what the brain is thinking and feeling sexually, and what’s happening in the genitals. It’s thought that this is an adaptation that happened way back in our evolutionary history, when unwanted sex was the norm. To protect itself from being damaged, the vagina lubricates in response to anything sexual, even if unwanted and upsetting. This also helps to explain why many women will report physiological sexual arousal (but not desire or psychological arousal) while being sexually assaulted; this often leads to confusion, misattribution of responsibility, and a whole whack of guilt and shame.

Our directors with some of our favourite colleagues and friends at the Society for Sex Therapy and Research (@SSTAR) conference last year: Dr. Jenn Bossio (@JennBossio); Dr. Morag Yule (@moragy); and Dr. Emma Dargie. We miss you all!

One of our directors, Dr. Jason Winters, speaking with JoyTV about aging and sex. Check it out!

Every February, the BC Psychological Association puts on high-quality, free psychology events throughout the lower mainland. Go check them out!

A friendly reminder that genitals are as diverse and unique as the people who they belong to! If you want to see more beautiful art like the one pictured that showcases genitals in all of their forms, we highly recommend checking out www.vielma.at

Ah, the unsolicited dick pic. If you've ever been on the receiving end of an unsolicited dick pic and wondered why the sender decided to send said pic, you're not alone! In the first study of its kind, researchers from Kwantlen Polytechnic University ventured to find out men's motivations for sending unsolicited pictures.... Over 1,000 men completed an online survey asking them about their motivations to send dick pics, their attitudes towards women, and aspects of their personality. The most frequently cited motivation was the hope of receiving a message in return. In other words, their dick pics were intended as an invitation. These men also scored higher on levels of narcissism (e.g., entitlement) and sexism (e.g., seeing women as inferior). Despite these men reporting higher levels of sexism, very few sent dick pics for misogynistic reasons. For most, it was more often a misguided attempt at attracting a partner than anything else. . . . #WestCoast #therapy #relationships #research #Kwantlen #KPU #Vancouver #VanCity Source: Oswald, F., Lopes, A., Skoda, K., Hesse, C. L., Pedersen, C. L. (2019). I’ll Show You Mine so You’ll Show Me Yours: Motivations and Personality Variables in Photographic Exhibitionism. The Journal of Sex Research (in press).

Thanks for Xmas gift @caradunkley! #sextherapy #crossstitch

In most relationships, there are implicit rules regarding what is considered cheating. Often, these rules aren't openly discussed and partners are left to make assumptions about what is considered infidelity and what is not. Not surprisingly, this can lead to some serious problems. 'Sexting' - the sending of sexually explicit messages, photos, or videos - is a relatively new way for people to get their sexual kicks. Where does sexting fit into the cheating picture for sexuall...y monogamous couples? Researchers from Trent University interviewed 700 people in sexually monogamous and sexually non-monogamous relationships about their sexting behaviour. Unsurprisingly, people in sexually non-monogamous relationships sexted more outside their primary partnership than those in sexually monogamous relationships. But, 19% of participants in sexually monogamous relationships reported sexting someone who wasn't their primary partner. The majority of participants in sexually monogamous relationships considered sexting outside their relationship to be cheating. However, 25% of participants considered sexting outside of their primary partnership to be just fine. In other words, there's lots of ambiguity regarding sexting as cheating. So what can you do to avoid confusion and potential conflict? Talk about it as part of a broader discussion regarding explicit rules around sexually monogamy. . . . Source: Falconer, T. & Humphreys, T. P. (2019). Sexting outside the primary relationship: Prevalence, relationship influences, physical engagement, and perceptions of cheating. The Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality. 28(2), 134-142.

PSA: #vaginas do not need to be detoxed! One of the many awesome things about vaginas is that they're self-cleaning. However, if you experience ongoing discomfort and/or unpleasant, pungent odour, it might be worth checking in with your doctor.... https://www.cbc.ca//heal/vtox-health-marketplace-1.5347367

When couples are in conflict, it's almost always a battle for who is right and who is wrong. And people will deploy all sorts of tactics to try to win this battle. Most often, nobody wins and nobody feels understood. Both partners end up angry, bitter, and resentful. The source of the conflict remains unresolved. Now, while it may be true that one perspective is more accurate or helpful, or that a compromise can be reached, starting the conversation without making an effort t...o understand the other's perspective almost always makes things worse. Understanding another's perspective, even though we might not agree with it, is the essence of empathy. This is the best first step in resolving conflict. People are much more likely to cooperate, collaborate, and effectively problem solve when they feel understood and vice-versa. So, even if it's hard to do, it may be more important to understand your partner's perspective than it is to get them to understand you, at least at first.