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Happy Birthday Hillary Clinton . She was Hillary Rodham at birth Now she's known as the scum of the Earth With her pay-to-play schemes... As her primary means Of compiling a massive net worth . She is wed to a fellow who's raped Many women but always escaped The long arm of the law And it sticks in the craw Of the victims he's left in his wake . When in Arkansas Hillary's role Was assisting her spouse in his goal Of corrupting the State As a man on the take With a talent to charm and cajole . As First Lady she served for eight years While Republicans cried in their beers In The Senate she sat Not too long after that Where she frightened her minions and peers . Later Hillary sought nomination For the chance to be running the nation Deeply in to the ground But the voters soon found She took many a shady donation . She got beat, to her great disappointment But received a high level appointment In the civic domain To diminish her pain Like Ben Gay or some other such ointment . The Benghazi attack caused her grief Like it did the Commander-in-Chief So they covered their tracks By obscuring the facts As subordinates lied through their teeth . Then a second time Hillary tried With a Jesuit mate by her side To become President Many millions she spent But she lost both the vote and her pride . Clinton also got in a jam With the feds for her e-mailing scam She seemed guilty as sin Then James Comey stepped in With an treasonous cover-up plan . Nowadays she is rumored to be Mobilizing for run number three At the nation's top job To live high on the hog While destroying the land of the free See more

Happy Birthday Ed Wood . He was born in Poughkeepsie, New York When a baby was brought by a stork As a wee bouncing lad... To his Mother and Dad Who were charged with parental support . He was clothed as a girl by his Mom Who was never too keen for a son Then cross-dressing resulted When Ed reached adulthood From what his old lady had done . For a movie career he was keen So he moved to the Hollywood scene As at age twenty-two What he wanted to do Was make films for the silvery screen . First he worked writing scripts for TV And then ads for a nominal fee He became quite adept Then began to direct Feature films in the land of the free . ‘Glen or Glenda’ addressed sexuality And the issue of human normality Christine Jorgensen’s life Was a story of strife And it bombed in most every locality . ‘The Night of the Ghouls’ wasn’t good For the movie career of Ed Wood But the man didn’t care Or get filled with despair He was doing the best that he could . But the film that defined his career Since the day that it made its premiere Was well known as ‘Plan Nine’ Which is aging like wine And can still make us smile ear to ear . Ed expired too young and too soon Like Gig Young, Mama Cass and Keith Moon Then his body was burned And his ashes were urned As opposed to interred in a tomb . So let's wish Happy birthday to Ed Who made films but not very much bread He was born on this day Now he’s long gone away Some believe he was touched in the head See more

Happy Birthday Sean Connery . He was born on this day in the nation Where scotch whisky's the favored libation And where bagpipes are played ... In a yearly parade For their patron saint's glorification . As an actor he struggled at first But his fortunes were quickly reversed When he landed the role Of a debonair mole With a limitless sexual thirst . 'Dr. No' was the sixties debut Of James Bond, who was eager to screw Any woman he met Who could make him erect During risky assignments he drew . In 'From Russia With Love' he was seen Once again as a pawn for The Queen, Who would surely be jailed If the truth were unveiled Of her dark and satanic regime . Then in 'Goldfinger' Pussy Galore Was employed as a high flying whore By a man who had much Precious metals and such But was keen to acquire much more . After 'Never Say Never Again' Was released by some rich businessmen Sean announced he was through Playing Bond, as he knew All good things have to come to an end . So let's wish Happy Birthday to Sean Who is known from Dundee to Saigon For portraying a spy With a glint in his eye And a highly libidinous dong See more

Crappy Birthday Barack Obama . He insists he was born on this date In Hawaii, the 50th State Of the land of the free ... But it's easy to see That the 'proof' of his birth is a fake . In Chicago Barack got connected With big money, which got him elected To a Senator seat In a State that's replete With corruption that goes undetected . In two thousand and eight he moved in To The White House, with things looking grim So he bailed out the banks As a way to say thanks For financing a fascist like him . As a liar he’s second to none Many treasonous yarns he has spun The Benghazi attack Showed his natural knack To deceive when he’s under the gun . He abandoned four fellows who died Like the victims of Bonnie and Clyde By ignoring their pleas To send help overseas Which his navy was keen to provide . Now Obama has turned fifty-eight Years of age as a future inmate Of a prison where he Will eventually be As a permanent guest of the state See more

Happy Birthday Philip Seymour Hoffman . In Fairport, New York he was raised In an era of social malaise When a war based on lies ... Fought by drafted GIs Put a million poor souls in their graves . Philip studied in theater arts As he sharpened his thespian smarts Then he went to auditions For Broadway renditions And landed some trivial parts . Then for Hollywood Philip was bound Where he truly began to astound For the roles he portrayed Lots of money he made And was quickly the talk of the town . In 'Scent of a Woman' he played A student who needed the aid Of his wealthy old Dad When a caper went bad And his partner in crime was betrayed . In 'Twister' he later appeared As a dude who was tubby and weird In pursuit of tornadoes Through fields of tomatoes Where death and destruction were feared . 'Boogie Nights' was a racy depiction Of a goofy young man on a mission To earn fortune and fame In the porno domain With a dick that defied all description . Philip brilliantly played Dan Mahowny From the nation of Brian Mulroney Where the current PM Should serve time in the pen Like Bill Clinton, George Bush and Jim Comey . In 'The Ides of March' Hoffman was cast As Paul Zara, assigned to the task Of ensuring a guy Who's deceitful and sly Gets elected and travels first class . So let's wish Happy Birthday to Phil Who provided us many a thrill In the parts he portrayed Quite unlike David Spade, Who finds work despite having no skill See more