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How Emotionally Responsive are You? Research over the past two decades about what is needed for a successful and enduring relationship has made some interesting findings. Unlike other animals on the planet, human being’s long-lasting mating relationships are not just a force to promote reproduction. Love is the important emotional force that is part of the social and psychological bond between humans. Researchers have discovered that love is an aspect of the human experience ...which is the pinnacle of evolution and the most compelling survival mechanism of the human species. Love drives us to attach emotionally with someone who will offer us psychological shelter from the storms of life. When we feel a loving attachment bond, we feel safe, confident and secure. When our partner is emotionally unavailable or unresponsive, we feel alone and often helpless. Then we are more likely to feel intense emotions like anger, sadness, hurt, and above all, fear. Fear is our built-in alarm system which is activated when our survival is threatened. Losing connection with our loved one jeopardizes our sense of security. According to neuroscientists, the alarm goes off in the brain’s amygdala. This almond-shaped area in the midbrain triggers an automatic response. We don’t have time to think; we feel fear and then we act. Read More: http://www.newinsights.ca//how-emotionally-responsive-are-

Are You Uncertain That Your Partner is a Grown Up? All human beings share the primitive instinct that familiarity means safety and security, according to John Bowlby, the pioneering psychiatrist of attachment theory. Therefore, those children who were raised in families with an emotionally immature parent, will often be attracted subconsciously to an emotionally immature, egocentric partner, when they are older and start dating.

How Children Cope with Emotionally Immature Parents When a child is raised by parents who consistently don’t engage with them in an emotionally attuned and mature way, and when parents regularly have trouble regulating their own emotions, showing little affection and empathy to their children, a child develops a variety of ways to cope with what is missing. Children of emotionally immature parents typically feel an emotional void and often feel insecure and lonely. When these... children become adults it is important for them to stop these childhood coping strategies and develop more healthy, mature emotional and relational habits in order to become content and emotionally secure. According to psychologist Lindsay Gibson, the two important ways children cope with emotionally immature parents is by imagining ‘healing fantasies’ and creating a ‘role-self’. To learn what is meant by ‘emotionally immature parents’, please see my article Healing from Emotionally Immature Parents

Healing from Emotionally Immature Parents Growing up with an emotionally immature parent can be a confusing, upsetting and lonely experience. Emotional loneliness comes from not having enough emotional connection with other people. It often begins in childhood with our parents. Emotionally immature parents can look and act normally enough. They care for a child’s health, provide meals and safety. However, when it comes to their relationship with their child, they don’t make a...n solid, secure emotional connection. Children of these parents suffer a gaping hole when it comes to feelings of emotional security that can last a lifetime. Emotional intimacy means you have someone you can tell anything to, share your feelings with and feel totally safe being that vulnerable. Emotionally mature parents provide this for their children by being emotionally attuned to their feelings and needs. They sooth and comfort them and help them feel connected and secure. Emotionally immature parents are usually so preoccupied with their own needs, that they are unaware of their children’s inner experience. If you were a child of emotionally immature parents, you would not have been aware that something was wrong at the time. You would not have known that your ‘hollow feeling’ was abnormal. Read more at :http://www.newinsights.ca//healing-emotionally-immature-pa See more

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